


Day & Night

by Skullszeyes



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Age Regression/De-Aging, Alcohol, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Different First Meeting, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Modern: No Powers, Awkward Crush, Bisexuality, Boys Kissing, Cigarettes, Confessions, Cuddling & Snuggling, Demisexuality, Drink Spiking, Drinking to Cope, Drugs, Drunken Confessions, Drunken Flirting, Drunken Kissing, Drunken Shenanigans, Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Romance, Excessive Drinking, F/M, Falling In Love, Fights, First Kiss, First Meetings, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Gentle Kissing, Hangover, House Party, Humor, Implied Relationships, Implied Sexual Content, Lies, Literal Sleeping Together, M/M, Male Friendship, Male Slash, Male-Female Friendship, Manipulation, Mental Health Issues, Minor Aqua/Terra (Kingdom Hearts), Minor Axel/Roxas (Kingdom Hearts), Minor Demyx/Zexion (Kingdom Hearts), Minor Riku/Sora (Kingdom Hearts), Minor Violence, Mutual Pining, Neck Kissing, No Smut, Not Beta Read, Out of Character, POV Male Character, Painkillers, Partying, Pining Riku (Kingdom Hearts), Platonic Relationships, Protective Riku (Kingdom Hearts), Roxas Being an Asshole (Kingdom Hearts), Roxas and Sora Are Siblings (Kingdom Hearts), Sleepovers, Some Plot, Strangers to Lovers, Swearing, Tags Are Fun, Time Skips, Truth, Unhealthy Relationships, Unreliable Narrator, Vanitas Swears (Kingdom Hearts), Vomiting, Xion Swears (Kingdom Hearts)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-05
Updated: 2020-02-10
Packaged: 2021-02-28 06:47:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 30,931
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22569607
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Skullszeyes/pseuds/Skullszeyes
Summary: Ventus is an alcoholic who sometimes does drugs with his friends, but he meets someone who he's instantly attracted too, and with each encounter, it becomes more and more intense.
Relationships: Aqua/Terra (Kingdom Hearts), Axel/Roxas (Kingdom Hearts), Demyx/Zexion (Kingdom Hearts), Riku/Sora (Kingdom Hearts), Vanitas/Ventus (Kingdom Hearts)
Comments: 13
Kudos: 49





	1. Riku's Party

**Author's Note:**

> This was meant to be shorter, but I kept writing, and it's longer than it should be. LOL. So, I split the chapters. Anyway, I wanted to write something less depressing, and since my teenage years when I used to drink and do drugs was my happier moments (kind of sad), I decided to write KH characters in that setting, I also used to write them in this setting when I was younger before I deleted those stories. :/
> 
> I hope you enjoy.
> 
> Comments and/or Kudo's are appreciated.

The first time Ventus came upon him was when he was on his way to Riku’s party. It was a Saturday night, and the air was crisp. His hands were tucked inside his jacket pockets and he stepped into the dark alley and as he got closer, he caught sight of a strange shape up ahead near a garbage bin. They were leaned against it, and to Ventus’ distaste, they were throwing up.

“Come on, I thought you could take that shit!” Someone else said a few feet away from the one throwing up.

“Shut it,” they snapped, voice raspy before they spit out more from their mouth before stumbling to the side. Their friend seemed to have walked back toward another group standing by the end of the alley.

Ventus took in a breath, only to find the person had stopped and seemed to be staring at him. It was a little awkward, and he fumbled for his phone inside his pocket as if it were going to somehow protect him from this situation.

“Mind not stepping in that?” they said, then spitting again in the other direction.

Ventus could see spikes of hair and a pale complexion, their eyes, however, were shrouded by their dark bangs. He didn’t recognize him as Ventus took a step away from the puke on the ground, teeth gritted, hands already going sweaty. He hated dealing with certain drunk alterations.

He took out his phone when he finally walked by, and glanced down at the text that came from his friend, Aqua. She was waiting for him, she added a laughing emoji and mentioned Terra’s smashed.

“Great…” Ventus muttered under his breath. He looked up toward the group standing at the end of the alley right before Ventus turned toward a wide yard with several other people hanging around a bright light above the door. There was the strong scent of alcohol and marijuana. He did notice when he was climbing the stairs that four people were standing around a table, almost hiding what they were doing, but it was obvious they were snorting another drug. 

Ventus stepped into the house, and gritted his teeth at the music pulsing off the walls. It was a little hard to navigate the room and almost ran into a few people. He knew them from his school, but it’s not like he talked to anyone all that much, besides the people he already knew.

“Hey,” he called to Axel who was in the kitchen, looking at his phone with a cigarette between his fingers, “where’s Terra and Aqua?”

Axel glanced down at him in an almost dismissive way. “Downstairs...Terra’s a little fucked up, so if you’re here to take him home…”

Ventus turned away from him and headed toward the back door and walked down the steps to his right. He kind of hated parties. There were way too many people, even on the stairs as he tried walking around them, a few girls that were way too young and slightly leaning on one another, mumbling to each other as he made it to the bottom. A few more people were snorting drugs in the laundry room as he walked by. A cloud of weed wafted in the air as he reached the back.

Riku was sitting in a lawn chair, alongside Aqua, Terra, Sora, and Roxas. Two random people were lying behind them on a mattress, already passed out. The four of them looked a little fucked up. Sora was holding a plate, but it was empty, and he was staring at the bong in front of them, his eyes were red, and his mouth was slightly open. Riku was staring at his phone, looking almost sweaty, while Terra was leaned against Aqua.

“Took you long enough,” Roxas said, narrowing his eyes at Ventus, his pupils were blown out, and his cheeks were red. He looked as sick as Sora, and was wiping away sweat from his face while holding a bottle of Vodka, it was half-empty.

Ventus shrugged, rocking back and forth. “I’m here for Terra, nothing more.”

“You’re leaving?” Riku asked, looking up at him in an almost offensive way if it wasn’t for his red eyes.

“That’s what I said.”

Aqua was nudging Terra awake, a smile on her lips, “Come on, Terra, we’re leaving.”

“Don’t leave,” Sora complained. Riku glared and almost kicked him.

Ventus hated parties. “Can we leave?” he asked Aqua.

She was trying her best to wake up Terra, but as the seconds passed by, Ventus let out a sigh and tried picking him up with Aqua’s help. They were struggling since he was heavier and taller than they were.

“He’s a bit enthusiastic when it comes to these things,” Riku said, reaching for the bottle in Roxas’ hands.

“Well, maybe you shouldn’t indulge him,” Ventus said, clenching his teeth as he struggled to hold up Terra’s dead weight. Why did he have to be taller than him? 

“It’s a party,” said Roxas while taking the lighter from Sora. “What else are we supposed to do, watch TV?”

“That’s what Axel’s doing,” Sora muttered. Roxas wrinkled his nose before sparking up a cigarette. 

It was so hot in the room, he isn’t even sure how any of them can deal with it. He almost spent ten minutes trying to wake up Terra so he can walk himself out of the house. And during that time, Ventus had inhaled both cigarette smoke and the weed that was sticking to the air, and he was already feeling dizzy.

“Go get another bottle,” Riku said to Sora.

“I can’t,” Sora said. He was lying on the floor and covering his face. “Text Axel, Roxas, tell him to bring another bottle.”

Roxas rolled his eyes, passing the cigarette to Riku and grabbed his phone from inside his black sweater. He went about texting Axel until they all heard screaming, and most of the people in the other room were sprinting for the basement steps.

“What the fuck is happening?” Riku asked, getting up from his lawn chair. 

There was the loud sound of glass shattering while the music upstairs went quiet, and all they could hear was thumping on the main floor. Axel appeared from the basement steps, telling the girls on the steps to get out of the house before he ran toward them, his eyes wild as he glanced at Ventus before finding Roxas who was glaring at him.

“We have to get the fuck out of here!”

“Why?” Riku asked as Axel reached down for Roxas’ arm and dragged him to his feet. He was a little off balanced and was leaned against Axel’s chest as he begin pulling him away from the room.

“Cops, they’re in the front, and chasing several in the alley,” Axel said, almost slurring his words. “Might want to get Sora out of here before his parents pick him up at the cells again.”

“Shit,” Riku said, looking down at Sora. “Axel, you have to get Sora out of here.”

“Let me go!” Roxas shoved Axel away from him before stomping his way to Sora and pulled him to his feet. Sora had also passed out, and was as much dead weight as Terra.

"Axel, help us," Aqua said.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” Axel muttered, swinging Terra's arm over his shoulder. They were a lot swift at it than with Ventus’ help.

“Make sure he doesn’t get caught,” Riku said to Ventus.

He nodded, “I really don’t want to deal with this,” he said while following the group up the stairs.

“Yeah, how do you think I feel? Everyone brought drugs here, and my parents might let me rot in jail for a bit,” Riku said, shaking his head as they headed up the stairs.

“I don’t think they’ll do that,” Ventus said, glancing down the hall toward the kitchen. Everyone had ran out, there were barely any stragglers besides a few who were passed out. He could see the glint of glass from the front door on the floor, followed by beer bottles left in the kitchen. It was a mess, but it was to be expected.

Riku stood at the back door, waving at them with an empty smile.

“My car’s down the street,” Aqua told them, pulling on Terra so Axel could walk to the left of the alley. Ventus helped Roxas with Sora, then Aqua told them to stand to the side of the alley, and they watched two cop cars drive by, their lights flashing, the siren the only thing that was loud on the rather dead street.

“Why’d you park so far away?” Axel asked.

“Last time I parked close, it was stolen,” Aqua told him, her voice tense. 

“Eh, sorry for asking.”

Ventus recalled the time when her car was stolen. It was found the next day, abandoned with a broken window, several beer bottles were in the back, including puke on the floor. It was a rough day, and Aqua had kept her anger under the surface as she got it cleaned out and repaired.

Sora groaned as they walked across the street, his brows knitted together, and he was slowly shaking his head, then Roxas and Ventus realized what was happening, and Sora threw up at their feet. Well, not directly, they had stepped away from it so it wouldn’t get on their shoes, but it definitely got on Sora’s.

“Fuck sakes, Sora,” Roxas said under his breath. They stepped over it and followed Axel and Aqua onto the next street.

Axel had a lit cigarette between his teeth as Aqua took out her keys and unlocked the doors to her black four door car sitting on the curb.

“Don’t smoke in my car,” Aqua said, glaring at him while passing the keys to Ventus who let go of Sora. 

“We’re all fucking drunk and high, but you won’t let me smoke?” Axel asked, sneering at her.

“You can walk home, Axel, I don’t fucking care,” Aqua told him while helping Terra into the car.

Axel grunted, then flicking the cigarette. “Someone’s going to have to sit on me,” Axel said, smiling at Roxas who glared at him.

“Let Sora, he’s smaller,” Roxas said, already opening the passenger seat door.

“I’m pretty sure he’s the same size,” Ventus remarked while starting up the car.

Aqua pulled Sora onto her lap, and groaned at the puke that was on the front of his shirt. Then Axel closed his side of the door, and Ventus drove away from the street.

They spotted another cop car but as they got further away from Riku’s house. Ventus hardly cared if Riku was arrested. It wouldn’t be the first time.

He didn’t think he would be picking up more than just Terra and Aqua. Axel, Roxas, and Sora came back to Aqua’s apartment where they laid Sora down on the couch. Roxas grabbed a spare blanket from the closet, including a pillow from the bedroom, and laid down on the floor. 

Axel had slept in the bathroom for some reason. Ventus was thinking it was because there was a window in the bathroom and he was smoking cigarette’s and didn’t want to piss off Aqua. Ventus had found a towel covering the bottom portion of the door so the smoke wouldn’t get out, and he was using a small towel as a blanket when Ventus had found him in the morning.

Aqua was sleeping in her own bed, while Terra was on the floor so he wouldn’t throw up on her things. And Ventus had slept beside her. At least until the morning when things had gone to shit for the rest of them, and Ventus wasn’t even drunk, but a migraine was forming on the sides of his head.

* * *

**Next Morning.**

“Get the fuck out!” Roxas’ voice echoed down the hall, and Ventus was stirring sugar in his coffee when it began. Sora was still passed out, but Roxas had taken his shirt off during the night so they could wash it, and he did look comfortable with a blanket tucked around him like a caterpillar.

Ventus almost had the thought that he could enjoy his morning. It was bare, an afterthought, maybe, but it was there, and like a bubble, it popped with Roxas’ rather loud voice that echoed inside the bathroom.

“Holy shit,” Axel said, laughing as he was forced out of the bathroom, the door slamming shut, forcing a groan from Sora’s lips, and a curse coming from Aqua’s bedroom.

He was a little disheveled, but a still strange ray of sunshine. He combed back his hair before falling into the chair, his body lanky as he seemed to sink in. His eyes slowly closing and opening before grinning at Ventus who was dropping another sugar cube into his cup of coffee.

“When you’d wake up?”

“An hour ago,” Ventus said, pressing his finger on his phone and watching it light up. “Eight.”

“I fucking hate waking up this early,” Axel said, rubbing his eyes. “You think Aqua has anything in her fridge?” He pushed himself up before Ventus could answer, and he opened the fridge then dug out a plastic carton of strawberries. His eyes were hungry, and his fingers were too as he ripped it open and plucking one of them out and sat back down.

He was a little transfixed until he ate it, moaning at the taste while Ventus picked up his coffee and took a sip.

“You make us enough or is that just for you?” Axel asked, indicating the coffee.

“There’s enough.”

“Good.” Axel left the strawberries on the table and grabbed a cup from the cupboard. While he did this, Roxas came out of the bathroom and took Axel’s seat. “You want coffee, Roxas?”

“Yeah,” Roxas said, rubbing his eyes. “Fuck, I hate this…”

“Coffee might help,” Axel said.

“No, no, you think she has more alcohol here?” And before either Ventus or Axel could answer, Roxas was already stumbling toward Aqua’s bedroom.

“He’s an alcoholic,” Ventus said, mostly to his coffee.

“Aren’t we all?” Axel sang while stirring the cream in his coffee. He sat back down and reached for the cubes of sugar in the box in front of Ventus. Roxas reentered the kitchen, looking almost distant, then he reached into the cupboard on the far end of the room and pulled out a wine bottle from the top shelf.

“That’s not going to cure your hangover,” Axel said in a matter-of-fact tone.

“It will, shut up,” Roxas said, popping the cork and pouring himself a glass. It looked purple from where Ventus was sitting.

“I don’t think she’ll be getting up until the afternoon,” Ventus said, just to change the subject. He didn’t really care if Roxas drank more alcohol. He did his part, he picked up Terra, and now he wanted to go home.

"Maybe she'll get up for the coffee," Axel said.

“You should make sure Riku’s okay,” Ventus said, taking another sip of his coffee. Then right on time, they heard a ringing in the living room, and for a second, they all went still until Sora fell off the couch with a thump. Roxas grimaced, and Axel laughed, and Ventus leaned to the side to see if he was going to get up until he spotted Sora staring at his phone.

“Are you okay?” Roxas asked, setting the glass down, and as he crossed the room, Axel got up and bolted to the glass, then to Ventus’ annoyance, he drank it.

“You just said—”

“Shut it,” Axel said sharply, then he sat back down with a smirk plastered on his face. He seemed really proud at what he had done.

Roxas was knelt down beside Sora, and they were whispering to one another. Roxas stood up and walked back to his empty glass, and he shot a glare at Axel.

“Don’t touch my fucking—”

They were interrupted by a loud thump, and something falling inside Aqua’s bedroom, and Terra appeared for a brief second, the bathroom door slamming open, and the sound of him retching in the toilet disgusted everyone in the kitchen.

Roxas slammed his hand on the counter and gagged, he turned away from them and leaned over the sink. Ventus pushed his coffee away from him. Axel, was happily drinking his coffee while watching the hallway.

“You okay, Terra?” Axel called.

Sora sat up, rubbing his eyes, his brown spikes were a lot more messier than usual, but he also seemed to notice he wasn’t wearing a shirt. “Did I go streaking again?”

“No,” Roxas and Ventus said at the same time, while Axel got up from his chair, with his coffee, to stand in the doorway and watch Terra throw up.

Ventus reached for one of the strawberries and quietly ate it while Sora struggled to get up from the floor, and Axel seemed to be comforting Terra. Roxas was refilling his glass with wine.

“Did Riku get picked up?” Ventus asked.

“No,” Sora said, staggering over to the table and sitting in Axel’s seat. “At least...how did I get here?”

“Cops showed up, and we made a run for it,” Roxas explained before downing his glass. 

“We didn’t run,” Ventus said, narrowing a glare at Roxas who sneered in return, “we walked, but it’s not like anyone stopped us from getting into Aqua’s car.”

“Not like last time,” Sora mumbled, then he placed his head down on the table and closed his eyes. 

“You’re okay,” Axel said, laughing in the bathroom, “you’re fine, you’re just a little wasted last night. We had to drag your drunk ass across the street. Hey, don’t worry about it, Sora was also drunk and passed out. He was a lot lighter though, so I don’t know…”

“They seem to be having fun,” Sora muttered.

“As much as a drunk can while throwing up in the bathroom,” said Ventus, pulling his coffee back toward him.

“Can you tell me what happened exactly?” Sora asked, raising his head to look at Ventus. “You were the only sober one, right?”

"It's exactly what Roxas said, everyone was drunk, cops showed up, you threw up in the street." Sora grimaced. "Roxas is drinking wine at nine-thirty in the morning..."

"I can do whatever I want in my young life," Roxas said, pouring himself another glass.

Ventus stared at Sora, at the bags under his eyes, the sick pallor of his skin, his greasy hair. He really needed to shower, and maybe just go home and sleep in his own bed. Roxas looked the same, but not as much since he was downing glass after glass after glass while Axel continued to comfort Terra.

“I’m going home,” Ventus said, taking one last sip of his coffee that was going cold. He got up from his chair and poured the rest of his coffee into the sink and set the cup down. Roxas had gone still, his fingers tapping on the counter, his gaze intense as he stared at Ventus.

“Thanks...for coming for us.”

Ventus gave a small insincere smile as he turned away from both Roxas and Sora, “I wanted to pick up Terra and Aqua, that’s all.” _You’re just a bunch of drunks who came along for the ride._

“Thanks anyways,” Sora muttered as he placed his head on his folded arms.

“Are you staying long?” Ventus asked as he slipped his shoes on. 

“We might head home in an hour or so,” Roxas said, looking at Sora who gave a weak thumbs up.

“Okay, well, I’ll see you some other time,” Ventus said, then he walked out, giving them one last wave before he was met with a bright sun. He descended the stairs of the apartment building and walked across the street. It was a little too warm and he unzipped his sweater, rolled up his sleeves, and walked the rest of the way home which was a few blocks away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The unhealthy bit of their relationships is the miscommunication, manipulation, alcohlism, and drug use. Which you'll see with each chapter.
> 
> I also wanted to de-age some of these characters because a lot of them are in their late twenties to early thirties. Terra (20), Aqua (19), Axel (19), Larxene (21), Saix (20), Y!Xehanort (20), Marluxia (21). // Roxas (18), Sora (18), Riku (19), Ventus (18), Vanitas (19), Zexion (20), Demyx (21), Kairi (18), Namine (18), Xion (18).
> 
> I put this because some people are uncomfortable about some of the canon ages of the characters (mostly Axel and Roxas).
> 
> Anyway, I'm just writing, that's all.
> 
> I hope you enjoyed.
> 
> Comments and/or Kudo's are appreciative.


	2. Cream Soda

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ventus gets high with his friends in the park.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is not edited, I wrote this at 1:30am, and I'm tired, and it's longer than the 1st chapter.
> 
> I hope you enjoy.
> 
> Comments and/or Kudo's are appreciated.

The second time he came upon him was a month after Riku’s party, and Ventus was sitting in the park with Sora, Roxas, and Zexion. It was about nine, and the mist that surrounded them had gotten thicker by the evening. Zexion had a thing about getting high in public places, but this time, he wanted to sit in the mist and trip out Sora and Roxas.

Ventus had come along because Sora wouldn’t shut up while begging him to go along with them. He promised he was going to hang out with Terra and Aqua, but he might have to do that later. 

“Is this new?” Roxas asked, looking at another of Zexion’s pipe’s he took out of his turquoise bag.

“No, I got it last week,” Zexion said, opening a bag of chips.

Sora was munching on his own bag of chips he _bought_ from the store, and he was wearing one of Roxas’ t-shirts, it was black with a cat on the front. He licked his dry lips before munching on more and more while Roxas passed the pipe to Ventus.

Ventus rarely got high, but he didn’t mind this time, and he took the hit and he let it all in before reaching for a bottle of pop he had _bought_ for himself. It was cold to his shaky fingers, and he had trouble taking off the cap before tossing it to the side and tipping his head back, letting the cold liquid fill his dry throat.

“How long have we been here?” Roxas asked.

“Maybe two hours,” Zexion said, placing the pipe down.

“Shit,” Sora said, gripping his phone and reading the text he had received, he seemed almost dissatisfied.

“What?” Roxas asked, watching Zexion putting away most of his stuff and zipping up the bag. 

“Kairi told Riku what we’ve been doing.”

“And?” Zexion asked, closing his eyes, “who cares if he knows.”

“He’s coming here, right?” Ventus asked, lying back against the soft grass and looking up at the mist covered sky. How the hell did they get there?

“He told Demyx.”

“So?” Zexion said, then he started to laugh, which was unusual for him besides having a drug in his system. He sounded a little nervous and excited at the same time.

Roxas groaned. “Please don’t fucking tell me Axel is also coming here…”

“I mean…”

“Fuck.” Roxas was getting up. “That asshole thinks he’s my mother—”

“Wouldn’t that mean, he’s my mother too?” Sora asked, wide eyed as he stared up at Roxas.

“No, shut up, that isn’t what I meant.”

“Then what did you mean?” Ventus asked. He kind of already knew what he meant, but he’d rather not say.

It was so damp, and he could swear he was floating, and it made him laugh or was he giggling? He heard Namine giggle before when she was high, it sounded demented, like a ghost inside a closet.

“Do you think ghosts exist?”

“Please, don’t fucking start this shit,” Zexion said, and Ventus was surprised to see him spinning with his arms out. Roxas was leaned against a light post with a phone to his ear, and Sora was still sitting beside him with his drink in his lap, and his phone in his hand.

“I’m just saying...they could exist.”

“I seen a ghost, but I’m pretty sure it was just Namine…” Sora muttered.

“Xion too?”

Sora shook his head. “No, I don’t think so.”

“Fuck you, I don’t need you babysitting me, you stupid fucking—” Roxas scowled at his phone as he walked back toward them. “That red haired bastard hung up on me!”

“Maybe because you were swearing at him,” Sora said, munching on his chips.

“Help me up,” Ventus said, waving his hands toward Roxas, “I can’t get up!”

Roxas reached down and pulled Ventus into a sitting position. “I don’t want them coming over here and ruining our fun.”

“They won’t,” Zexion said, spinning back over to them, and before he could fall, Roxas grabbed him. “We just have to make sure they don’t catch us.”

Sora started laughing. “Holy shit, that’s what we should do, we should fucking run from them, and see if they can catch us!”

“They’re going to catch us, though,” Roxas said, frowning.

“No, they won’t,” Ventus said, struggling to stand. He wasn’t sure about this idea, his legs felt as if they weight way too much, maybe more than his entire body. “We’ll out maneuver them.”

“Not like this, we won’t.” Roxas sighed.

“Ask Riku if they’re here,” Zexion said to Sora. Ventus watched Zexion open one of the bottles and took a long swig of it before passing it to Roxas. He remembered his own and wondered when he put the cap on. 

Sora grinned, blinking his shiny eyes a few times, “He’s asking me where _we_ are.”

“We should get out of here.” Roxas helped Ventus to his feet while Zexion did the same for Sora. They were on the feet, and following Zexion while Ventus held onto Sora’s arm, trying his best not to fall, at the same time, drinking his pop. The sweetness exploded in his head, and he couldn’t help laughing at the taste.

“Gross, you like cream soda?” Roxas grimaced.

“You didn’t complain when I _bought_ it.”

Zexion chuckled, reaching Sora’s left arm, “Tell Riku we’re on the east side of the park, near the monument in the center.”

“The mist isn’t that thick,” Roxas said, walking backwards with his hands in his pockets.

“Dude, I can barely see my own fucking hand,” Ventus said, looking at his hand and waving it through the mist. “Holy shit, are we fading?”

“Not yet,” Sora remarked while texting. “You got anymore before we do?”

“Yeah, but I want to make sure they aren’t close.”

Ventus has little idea what is going on. They’re floating on clouds and it’s the best feeling he could think of. Amazing in every way possible. There’s nothing strenuous about this feeling. He almost wants to stay in this state of mind, to sleep in it, to wake to it, to feel it every second of the day, but he also knows that it’ll fade away, and he isn’t entirely sure if it’s a good or bad thing. Light and dark. Merging together, the answers and questions like smoke burning the tongue, and abuse in the eyes, all of it strained from one another.

“They brought Larxene,” Sora said, and he spoke as if he was in pain, a hiss, a groan, ugly and twisted that Roxas goes still, and they almost run into him.

“Why?” he snaps, anger flaring in his eyes, between his teeth, directed at the wrong people as he turns around.

“I don’t know, Riku said they brought her and some other people,” Sora shrugged, annoyed. “He called it an inconvenience.”

“Tell them to fuck off then,” Zexion said, and somehow he had lit a cigarette and was blowing out the smoke.

“I did,” Sora said, and they continued walking. “He just thinks it’s funny to bother us…”

“Then we should leave,” Ventus told them, reaching for the cigarette in Zexion’s hand. He pulled out another and passed it to Ventus who placed it to his mouth while Zexion flicked a lighter to light the tip.

“Where’s your car?” Roxas said to Zexion.

Zexion snorted, “I’m not driving like this, I knew a guy who got a fine for that shit, and I can’t pay for it, not with the job I have.”

They were at a crossroads, or maybe a brick wall which ever. Roxas wanted to leave, but he didn’t want to walk, Zexion didn’t care how they left, and both Sora and Ventus ended up on the grass again.

Unfortunately, Ventus had spilled his cream soda to the disinterest of Roxas who kicked the bottle, some of it had splashed on Ventus’ face and the front of his shirt. While Sora went back to eating his chips and waiting for Riku’s text.

“They might be waiting for us to...you know, fuck up,” Roxas said, eating some of Sora’s chips.

“That’s why we should leave,” Zexion said, shaking his head. “Demyx is a lost cause if he’s against me, so I think you should call Xion, and get her to drive here, then we’ll have a car, and someone sober who won’t get a fucking ticket.”

Roxas was nodding as he took out his own phone. Ventus feeling left out, also took his phone out, and realized he had a text message.

_Where are you? - Terra._

“Shit, I think Terra is against me too.”

“Well, then, I think we should move to another continent and change our names,” Sora said with a deep sigh. 

Ventus scowled as he put his phone back inside his pocket. Is this how they’re friendship is going to go? Betrayal? Is Aqua also betraying him? No, that can’t be it? This can’t be real, is it?

“Xion said she’s on her way,” Roxas said, and the second he stood up, Zexion was laughing almost hysterically as he grabbed Roxas and yanked him toward him before pointing.

They all looked, and they could see strange forms appearing in the mist. Four of them from the looks of it.

“Aw, fuck, we stayed here for far too long,” Sora said, getting to his feet.

“Someone, help me,” Ventus said, reaching his hands out to his friends.

Roxas and Zexion grabbed him and the four of them sprinted across the field. Sora was laughing as he was dropping his chips in the grass.

“Fuck, they’re going to catch us!” Sora shrieked.

Ventus was laughing alongside Roxas and Zexion before they skidded to a stop, almost slipping in the wet grass. 

“Shit,” Roxas said under his breath. There were two other forms appearing in the direction they were coming from, and Ventus recognized Larxene and Axel. 

“We have to separate,” Sora suggested.

“Text Xion once you get away,” Zexion said, then he was heading the other direction, same for Roxas and Sora.

Ventus scrambled away, unable to stop laughing, and fortunately, he was sure that he was the first to find the street. His feet no longer hit soft wet grass and found the hard cement surface, almost tripping when he jumped from the sidewalk and onto the dark asphalt, he headed straight for a back alley. It almost felt like a dream, as if he was entering another part of the world. A second in the clouds, the next, a dark alley where the light met the shadows, then his heart was racing, and he knew something but he couldn’t recall what it was until he was swiftly yanked back, a choked gasp was cut off as he was thrown roughly against the hard concrete surface.

He was almost pulling on the front of his shirt while trying to suck in breath from the whiplash. His eyes focused on an individual in front of him who was pulling out a cellphone.

“What the fuck?” Ventus muttered.

“I should be asking you that.” He sent the text and tucked the phone into his pocket, then he met Ventus’ eyes, and there was something in his gaze that seemed taken back, a blink of confusion flowing through his expression before realization picked it all up, and he was standing straight, glaring half-heartedly with a smirk on his lips.

_He was...he was...._

“You’re the guy from the alley.”

Ventus did not expect to hear that. “W-What?”

He shook his head, “Never mind, doesn’t matter. Your friends have been looking for you, Ventus, right, that’s your name?”

_Friends? Right. Fuck. This guy is a part of that…_

“Look, they don’t need to know about me, or you, or whatever, I just want to leave,” Ventus said, trying to slowly move away from him.

He quickly moved, placing a hand against the wall to stop Ventus from going anywhere else. “I don’t think so.”

Great. Now what? What the fuck is he supposed to do?

“My friends are idiots, trust me, they won’t care if I leave,” Ventus said in an almost pleading way.

He leaned close, his left hand placed on the other side of Ventus, and said in an almost sweet voice that also sounded threatening, “I don’t fucking care if your friends are idiots, trust _me_ on that.” Then he leaned in and smelled Ventus, and the action was quick before his golden eyes flicked up to meet Ventus’, and he said, “You smell like cream soda.”

Ventus blinked, trying to figure out what the hell is going on before saying, “Why are you—”

“Riku promised us a bit of what your friend Zexion has, and I really don’t want to miss out on that.” Ventus almost lied and told this random person that Zexion didn’t have anything, but he was yanked away from the wall and dragged to the end of the alley.

“No, let go of me.” Ventus could hardly focus while he was being dragged toward the park. To his disappointment, he could hear Roxas yelling at Axel, and when they followed the voices, they came upon Roxas glaring at Axel, along with Larxene, Terra, Kairi, and Namine.

“Here.” Ventus was shoved toward Terra who caught him.

“Hey, Ven,” Terra said almost sheepishly.

Ventus stumbled back, glaring at him. “What the fuck? Can’t you guys take a hint.”

Roxas turned away from Axel, his teeth clenched as he stood beside Ventus. He was fuming from what happened, and didn’t look like he wanted to talk all that much.

“Do you know who that is?” Ventus whispered.

Roxas grunted, then he glanced to the side and back at Ventus. “Vanitas. He’s somewhat friends with Xion and Riku, I met him through Aqua.”

That was weird. “I never met him before.”

Roxas shrugged, rubbing his arms. “He has his own group of friends to hang around with, I have no idea why the fuck he decided to waste his time,” then he decided to raise his voice, “with these fucking idiots!”

Axel grinned at him, and Larxene stuck the finger at him.

“Come on, Roxas,” Kairi said, her arms crossed, “we did tell you guys not to get high in the park.”

“Doesn’t mean you can fuck us over as if we’re twelve,” Roxas said without looking at her.

Ventus was sobering up, which wasn’t exactly helping him all that much. “Where’s Aqua?” he asked Terra.

“Driving the car to this side of the park.”

Ventus hummed and caught Sora’s voice growing closer to the rest of them, but Zexion and Demyx were the first to appear in the mist. Demyx was going on about something, and Zexion seemed completely into what he was talking about until he waved at Roxas and Ventus. He ran past Larxene and Terra, and wrapped his arms around both of them.

“Xion is a block away,” he whispered, “I told her we’ll be there once we lose these bunch of idiots.”

“Did you give them anything?” Roxas asked, seeming to have calmed down.

Zexion nodded, “I had too, Demyx has half of what I was holding, he also took one of my pipes.”

“You can get more, right?” Ventus asked. His mouth was dry, and the dizziness was wearing off, the mist was just mist, nothing too interesting anymore. He did feel heavier than he had before, a lot sleepier.

“Yeah, once Sora is with us.”

Sora’s voice was growing louder, and while they waited, Ventus did one thing he didn’t think he’d do, and that was to glance at Vanitas, and to his surprise, Vanitas was looking back at him. 

Ventus looked away quickly, his face flushing, heart racing. _Oh shit._

“Ventus _bought_ it for us,” Sora said as he and Riku appeared from the mist. He was clinging to Riku, and his eyes were in a loving manner, but it was more apparent when he’s either drunk or high.

Riku glanced up at Ventus incredulously. “You mean he stole it?”

Ventus shrugged, giving him a sheepish smile, “Does it matter how I procured it?”

“Can we go?” Larxene asked, glaring at Riku. “You made us look for these idiots—”

“You didn’t really _look_ for them,” Namine interjected.

“Shut it, you little witch!”

Kairi sighed, stepping between the two. “Come on, Aqua should be here.”

Vanitas scoffed, “Not all of us are going to fit in her car.”

“Demyx,” Riku said, “go get your car.”

Demyx wrinkled his nose, glancing at Zexion who wasn’t paying attention to him. “Fine, I’ll be right back.” Then he was sprinting off into the mist.

Sora had joined them and wrapped his arm around Roxas, then he leaned close and said, “I stole his wallet.”

Ventus raised a brow at Riku and wondered how he didn’t notice, then again, he rarely noticed much when Sora was around.

Roxas had to nudge Sora to stop him from laughing. “Xion’s a block away.”

“When should we make a run for it?” Ventus asked, glancing warily at Vanitas who had his arms crossed while he spoke to Terra. He couldn’t remember where he had seen him. He brought up an...alley? Was that him in the dark, throwing up on the ground? Ventus didn’t know, he could hardly see him.

It’s getting kind of cold. Ventus shuddered, and when he did, Vanitas glanced at him, and Ventus had to try his hardest not to look at him.

“I think something’s wrong with me…” he said to Roxas.

“I’ve been asking that same question about Axel.”

“About you?”

“No.” Roxas glared, and he almost sounds resentful. “Axel’s just weird...too friendly.”

“I think it’s because he likes you,” Sora whispered, leaning against Roxas with his eyes closed, and both Ventus and Roxas looked toward Riku who was watching them with intense longing that they both could feel. For Ventus, it’s uncomfortable as much as Vanitas staring at him, and as much as Demyx sometimes stares at Zexion, and when Axel tries to be sneaky when he yearns for Roxas from across a room.

“Shit, there’s way too many of them,” Roxas whispered, trying to hide his face against Ventus, and this only adds to Axel’s confusion who is now standing beside Riku, and they’re talking to one another, probably about this situation.

“Good thing Demyx isn’t here,” Zexion whispered as he leaned against them, “or he’d be looking at us like they are.”

“If you guys don’t get your shit together,” Ventus said, nudging Sora and Roxas, “we won’t be able to run while those two fuckers are staring like sad puppies.”

“Who’s a sad puppy?” Vanitas asked who was suddenly standing beside Ventus.

He jumped at the sight and proximity of him, including Sora, Roxas, and Zexion. Great. Shit. He was right there, and Vanitas was staring at him as if he’s meant to answer his dumb question, and he feels as if Vanitas knows what they’re about to do, which is a problem because he’s so fucking close. Fuck sakes.

“Riku,” Sora piped up, releasing Roxas’ arm, “is a puppy.”

Riku frowned while Axel chuckled.

“So is Axel,” Roxas said, glaring at him, “a pathetic one.”

Larxene snorted, “You’re really going to take that, Axel?”

Namine sighed, she had come back after she and Kairi had gone to the road to wait for the others. “Aqua’s here, so is Demyx.”

“You didn’t answer my question,” Vanitas said, taking Ventus’ arm while Roxas let go of his so they could walk toward the street.

“Uh...no one, I mean, they are,” Ventus said, hating that he was fumbling over his words. He shouldn’t feel affected, but while looking at Vanitas, he had this intensity that was somehow awkward to deal with. Except, was it awkward? Ventus wasn’t sure what it was, he was tired, he wanted to sleep, his mouth was dry and he hated that Roxas spilled his drink.

“Come with me,” Vanitas said, his voice lowering as if he was telling Ventus a secret, “and I’ll buy you another cream soda.”

Ventus opened his mouth, but no words fell from them. He had nothing to say, he was struck by what the fuck was going on? There was a subtle sincerity in Vanitas’ eyes that Ventus was trying to decipher in the seconds they had together before it was taken away, in which Vanitas got too impatient and twisted them around. He said something under his breath that sounded like _never mind_ before pulling Ventus toward the street where the others were.

“This is kind of a clusterfuck,” Ventus remarked.

“I agree,” Vanitas said.

Ventus then pulled his arm out of Vanitas’ and staggered over to Roxas and Sora, then grasped Zexion’s arm, “We have to get the fuck out of here, I think I’m developing a crush.”

“It’s too early for that,” Sora muttered, staring down at his phone. “Okay, I told Xion we’ll be there in five minutes.”

Roxas turned his head, brows pinched in a confused way. “What the fuck do you mean by _five minutes_? How the fuck are we getting away from these assholes in five fucking minutes, Sora? Tell me!”

Sora laughed while Aqua got out of her car, and Demyx was waving at Zexion. “We have to go right now if we’re going to get out of here.”

Zexion was laughing alongside him. “Come on, one,” Ventus glanced at Vanitas who was walking toward Terra and Riku, “two,” Axel was staring at Roxas who was rocking back and forth, “three!” 

They struggled for a second, but they bolted down the street, away from their group of friends, and they were laughing as the others started swearing at them.

“Holy fuck!” Sora yelled into the night air.

“Run, run, run, run!” Roxas called.

Ventus’ heart was racing as he glanced back, and the ones who were chasing them were Vanitas, Axel, Riku, Terra, and Larxene. It was a rather scary bunch, which didn’t help Ventus’ hysterical laughter leaving his throat, even though fear is what was thrumming in his veins.

“Fuck, they’re going to catch us!” Zexion said, gripping Ventus’ arm to keep him from dragging behind.

They sprinted across the street that connected four lanes, and to their relief, there weren’t any cars, and it was kind of confusing but Ventus had little time to question what time it was. How long were they in the park for? It was only three hours, right? No...that can’t be right.

“She’s right there,” Roxas said, pointing toward a dark haired girl standing beside her blue four door car, it was similar to Aqua’s, but of a different brand, and it didn’t smell like vomit and cigarette smoke. She always liked things smelling clean and new, so that’s what Xion always achieved, at least until now.

Xion had an excited look on her face as she unlocked the car, and got inside, the second they reached it, Ventus shoved Zexion over, while Sora got the passenger seat, he was shrieking to Xion while Roxas landed on the floor of the car as the door closed shut behind him.

“Holy shit, what the fuck happened?” Xion asked as she started up the car, and Ventus pulled himself up so he can look out the back window. He couldn’t help but laugh at the group walking back to the rest of their friends. 

“We got caught by those assholes,” Sora said, taking out his phone, then he let out a short breath, “Riku’s phoning.”

“How?” Xion asked, and glanced at Zexion, “I thought they didn’t know you were there?”

“Kairi snitched us out to Riku, then he brought a bunch of people to catch us,” Zexion said, a hand to his chest as he panted.

Ventus couldn’t let go of the wide smile on his face as he sat back against the leather seat. He had to say this was the best day of his life, at least at the moment.

Roxas was scowling at his phone as he placed his legs on Zexion and Ventus’. “Axel’s starting his threats.”

“So what, we got away,” Sora said. “Riku’s doing the same, but I hardly care what he thinks of what I do with my time.”

Zexion had his phone in his hands and was smiling pleasantly at whatever texted he received. “Demyx is a sweetheart like always...an idiot, but a sweetheart.” He put his phone away. “I do agree with Sora, we shouldn’t care about what they think of us, they’re the ones who ruined our fun.”

Ventus was catching his breath while Sora ignored Riku’s phone calls, and Roxas was angrily texting Axel back, and Zexion happily ignoring Demyx. 

And he decided to check his own phone, slightly scared of what he’ll find. Aqua texted him, nothing too special besides her own worries about why he ran off, nothing from Terra which is to be expected, and there was one other text that came from an unknown number.

“Fuck,” Ventus frowned.

“What?” Zexion asked, tilting his head to look at his phone screen. “Who’s that?”

“I think they gave my number to that guy, Vanitas.”

“Or he asked for it,” said Roxas.

Why would he want his number? That made no sense. They were strangers, they weren’t even close friends, and yet…

_Do you still want that cream soda?_


	3. Wasted

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm cutting this chapter in two because it was going on and on, and I don't want it to be as long as the second chapter. :)
> 
> I hope you enjoy.
> 
> Comments and/or Kudo's are appreciated.

The third time Ventus had come upon him was three weeks after the park incident. He hardly remembered much once Aqua started passing the shots to Ventus around eight at night. At first, the taste was raw in his mouth, then he was getting used to it and chugging the bottle halfway through until Aqua had to pull it away from him.

“The others aren’t even here yet,” Aqua said, twisting the cap back on the Whiskey bottle.

When he was about sixteen, he watched Aqua knock back drink after drink with a smirk on her face. She always knew how to drink, it made her fun to be around, and because of it, she attracted a lot of attention. Of course, she only had eyes for Terra until they became official about a year ago when she finally stopped with the hints and simply asked him out.

“When...when are they going to be here?” Ventus asked. He blinked a few times, a smile spreading across his lips. He loved alcohol when it made him feel good. The world spun in a good way, and he could laugh without feeling awkward. A rare freedom, a luxury at his fingertips while money flies into the sky. Maybe it’s the youth he was trying to rid from his body, or the poison in his mind that drowns with each unbearable thought.

Ventus clings to Aqua, leaning his head against her shoulder while she slowly rocks back and forth upon the grass.

“Soon,” she whispers with an alcoholic breath, and the strong acrid smell of smoke coming from the tip of her cigarette sitting between her fingers.

“How soon?”

“There’s Roxas.”

Ventus opens his eyes and spots him sprinting toward them upon the cement walkway before his feet hit the grass. His blue eyes are wide and luminous, and he’s wearing a wide smile while gripping a bag full of munchies, with another that’s holding two more bottles of alcohol.

He slides and falls against Ventus, a laugh escaping his lips as he sits the bag of munchies to the side, before placing the other bag between his legs. “Xion picked up Zexion and Sora, they should be here in fifteen minutes.”

Ventus reached into his sweater pocket for his phone while Ventus takes the Whiskey bottle from Aqua. He looked down at the recent text message he ignored, but kept. _He_ keeps trying to text him, but Ventus doesn’t want to talk to him.

“Terra’s still pissed off at you,” Aqua says.

Ventus shoves his phone back inside his pocket. “So?”

“You ran off, Ven, and he was just trying to look after you.”

Roxas scoffed, twisting the cap off the bottle. “You’re really taking his fucking side?” This is a dumb question, and Aqua doesn’t remark on it. “They shouldn’t have been there in the first place, and Riku’s just an overprotective asshole. Sora’s been avoiding him for maybe about a week…”

Zexion didn’t bother to do the same with Demyx. They were on nicer terms than the rest of them. Zexion hardly cared if Demyx was there, while Roxas wouldn’t let go of his resentment toward Axel. He kept bothering Roxas whenever he gets the chance, which doesn’t exactly help all that much.

“He’s not going to do that,” Ventus said. Sora started talking to Riku after the first week, and they seem to have put it behind them.

“It’s childish, for one,” Aqua said, passing the cigarette to Ventus who placed it to his lips, sucking in, then blowing out the smoke.

Roxas shook his head, “It had nothing to do with them.”

Ventus didn’t hold a grudge against them that much. Terra seemed to be, and Roxas, while the others didn’t care. They were high in a park, why should it matter? It didn’t. Roxas just liked holding on to the wrong thing, and Terra...well, he wasn’t sure about why he was still pissed off.

_“He’s hurt,” Aqua had said earlier that week, her arms crossed. “That’s all, if you said you were sorry and—”_

_“I’m not apologizing, there’s no point in doing that,” Ventus said to her, “tell him to let it go already.”_

Ventus flicked the cigarette and took the bottle from Roxas. They waited for another few minutes before Roxas told them Xion, Zexion, and Sora were on the other side of the park. They got up, and linked arms, Roxas held one of the bags, Aqua held the other. Ventus was the only one trying to not look as if he wasn’t drunk, which wasn’t helping, and Roxas decided to tease him.

“You’re such a light weight.”

“No, I’m not,” Ventus said, but he couldn’t deny his lip was numb, and his legs felt a little weak. 

As they walked along the lake, passing a few people, Roxas started waving at Xion who was walking alongside Sora and Zexion. The three of them sprinted toward them. Ventus quickly realized the three of them were high.

Zexion placed a finger to his lips once they found a bench to sit on. “We can do it, but I don’t want anyone else finding out.”

“Who’s going to find out?” Sora asked.

Aqua was texting Terra and informed them that a group of them showed up on the other side of the lake. There was a fair going on at the center of a plaza, and even though there were police officers, it was easy to hide their alcohol.

“You’re meeting up with Terra?” Ventus asked.

Aqua nodded, “Just text me when you’re leaving, and I’ll come meet you.”

Ventus nodded and watched her head along the boulevard before disappearing into the growing crowd. When he turned around, Roxas was sticking the alcohol into Zexion’s turquoise bag, and Sora was spinning in circles and giggling.

“Be careful, I don’t want anything smashing.”

“Dude, the only way this shit is going to smash is if you’re thrown hard to the ground,” Roxas said, roughly zipping up the bag.

“It could happen.”

“Can we go?” Xion asked, taking Sora’s hand.

“Where are we going?” Ventus wondered, then he was being pulled down the boulevard, but instead of following Aqua, they headed toward a pathway in the grass that led between the trees. Another concrete path was on the other side, but they continued walking, Xion’s dress and Roxas’s sweater were stuck in the branches, and they had to stop for a second to get them untangled before they headed off on the outskirts of the fair. Zexion watched a few police officers before signaling to his friends to follow him.

“We should be okay over here,” Zexion said.

They stood in an alcove. It wasn’t exactly great all that much, there were two pathways that led to the back of the building, and another that led to the front. Although it seemed a little dead.

“We should check out the food stands after this,” Xion said, peeking around the corner at the bright orange and yellow lights that came from the tents that covered the entire street, and the plaza. There was music coming from that area, while a group of people were walking along the street toward the stands. 

Ventus knew it was some kind of national holiday, but he rarely noticed them all that much, so it didn’t matter to him. He waited for Zexion to unzip his bag, passing some of the essentials to Roxas who gave the bag that held their chips and candies to Sora, then Xion joined them, and right before Zexion could spark up lighter, Ventus heard voices.

“Hide it,” Ventus said, standing in front of Roxas while Zexion turned toward him, and Xion was beside Zexion, Sora was beside Ventus and hugging the bag to his chest. Their bodies were slightly turned, and looked incredibly suspicious.

Ventus felt a little awkward, and even though the night was becoming a bit colder, his hands were still sweaty, and his mind swimming with alcohol. Then his heart started racing when he made eye contact with golden irises.

“Oh shit,” he said under his breath, unsure why he felt as if he was caught red handed.

Vanitas was standing alongside with three others, and it reminded him of what Roxas had said that he had other friends he usually hangs around with. Ventus didn’t expect his _friends_ would be Marluxia, Saix who was a friend of Axel’s, and a long silver haired male who Ventus knew as Xehanort. He rarely appeared at parties, and when he did, he was mostly doing drug deals then he’d leave.

They were kind of an intimidating bunch, and Ventus almost shrank away from them if it wasn’t for Roxas’ disinterested glance, Sora humming, and Xion biting down on a few chips from an open bag, the crunch diffused the one second awkwardness that Ventus felt when he made eye contact with Vanitas.

There was only a slight disappointment when Vanitas looked away, followed by Xehanort, and Saix, then Marluxia was the last who lagged behind only to smirk at Zexion who glanced at him, then glanced away. Ventus knew that they had been somewhat acquainted because of Demyx.

“Always the stoner,” Marluxia said to Zexion. “Does Demyx know what you’re doing, oh, I’m guessing he doesn’t even know you’re back here with your little friends.” 

Ventus arched a brow. They weren’t that young…

Marluxia glanced at Roxas and said, “Axel’s here, he’s been asking around for you, I guess he’ll be disappointed you’ve been hiding out, I can see you’re as much as a stoner as Zexion.”

“Shut the fuck up, Marly,” Roxas snarled.

Marluxia chuckled as he walked off after his friends. The second they disappeared, Roxas was cursing under his breath, Zexion was ignoring what happened and was placing the weed in the pipe and flicking his lighter. Xion stood with her arms crossed, less perturbed than how he and Roxas felt. Sora did not care, and Ventus kind of wanted to know how he could be like that.

“Why do I feel like I just got caught cheating on my—”

“It happens,” Roxas said, taking the offered pipe from Zexion. “Just let it go and let’s get high, then we can find Aqua and get the fuck out of here.”

“Who knows if she wants to come back with us,” Xion said, taking out her cellphone.

After Roxas, it was Ventus’ turn, then Xion, Sora, and Zexion again. They did this for a few minutes until Roxas took out one of the bottles, unscrewed the cap and took a swig.

“This is not a great place to get drunk,” Zexion said while placing his stuff back inside his bag. “If you get fucking wasted, we’ll be the ones having to drag you out of here, and I don’t want to do that.”

“I don’t either,” Sora said, taking the bottle from Roxas and took a quick swig before twisting the cap on.

“We should find Aqua,” Ventus said. He couldn’t get rid of the overwhelming feeling that he was walking on clouds. That was the only other thing he could feel besides the alcohol swimming in his system like tiny fish. Why was he thinking about fish? In his veins…

“We’re an ocean,” Ventus said, linking his arms with Sora as they wandered away from the alcove.

“No, I think we’re birds.” Then Sora started flapping his arms, and Xion couldn’t stop laughing until she was crying. They sat down on the grass, and Zexion was making snow angels, but without the snow.

“Make sure you don’t fucking break that,” Roxas said to Zexion, pulling the bag away from his swaying arms. 

“If you steal that, I won’t ever forgive you!”

“I’m not going to steal shit all,” Roxas said, grabbing the Vodka bottle from Sora. Ventus knew he could down Vodka better than Whiskey. Aqua had also bought a tequila bottle, but she had it with her.

Ventus somehow took the bottle and had it to his lips until Sora took it from him. It spilled on the front of his shirt, a bit of it slipping under his shirt, and he wiped at his skin. He glared at Sora and right when he was going to react, Xion had gasped hard, already getting to her feet.

“Sora!” 

“Shit,” Sora said, taking the bottle from his mouth and looking toward a group walking towards them.

Zexion was already on his feet, pulling the bag over his shoulder, Roxas had yanked Sora to his feet, and Xion...well she was already gone.

“Why the fuck are you guys always bothering us?” Roxas asked, pulling Sora away from Riku, Terra, Aqua, Demyx, and Axel.

Ventus spotted Vanitas, Marluxia, Larxene, Xehanort, and Saix lagging behind. They were talking amongst each other, and actually looked bored of what was happening.

“Maybe cause you’re fucking wasted,” Axel said, and he did not look like he was playing around this time. He actually looked pissed off. “There’s police officers over there, you idiots, and you’re drinking right in the fucking open.”

“They’ll arrest you for open container,” Riku said, taking the bottle from Sora’s loose grip.

“And drug possession,” Demyx added, waving at Zexion who grimaced.

“You guys are really fucking annoying,” Ventus remarked, and before he could fall, Aqua grabbed his wrist and helped him to stand.

“You can continue to drink,” Terra told him, “we’re going back to Axel’s.”

“We’re actually taking these kids?” Marluxia remarked, standing to the side.

“We’re not kids, you fucker,” Roxas snapped, and all Marluxia did was smile. 

“Whatever,” Sora said, brushing Riku’s hands off of him, “can we just go, and can someone look for Xion.”

“I will,” Ventus said, pushing Aqua’s hands off. It must’ve not looked as convincing the second he turned around when he felt a hand on his arm, and he looked only to feel rooted to the ground. 

Vanitas stared at him with a deadpan expression. “I don’t think so...you’ll probably pass out in the parking lot.”

“What? Fuck off,” Ventus said, almost about to shove him off, but Aqua stepped past them.

“I’ll go look for her, I’ll meet you guys at Axel’s.” Terra followed after her, and they were all being steered toward the road, away from the crowd and police officers that were walking around the perimeter.

Ventus walked with Vanitas as if he were a runaway child. He glanced back at Sora and Roxas who were also being treated in the same manner. Zexion was doing a lot better and seemed to be laughing about something with Demyx.

“Are you always this troubling when you’re drunk,” Vanitas asked, glancing at him, “or high?”

“Not really,” Ventus muttered. “I’m fun when I’m not interrupted.”

“We’re saving you, not fucking with your night.”

“Same fucking difference, we’re not kids.”

Vanitas scoffed, “Then stop acting like you are. I haven’t been this bothered by a group in a long time.”

Ventus gritted his teeth at Vanitas’ rather annoying comments. There was one thing he didn’t get, but Vanitas was gripping his arm. Sure he was helping him to walk while the others didn’t seem interested in Ventus all that much once Aqua and Terra left, and his friends were being somewhat interrogated and annoyed by their...what were they to them?

“I never did ask…” Ventus said to himself, glancing at Sora who was smiling sweetly to Riku, clinging to his arm as if they were a love sick couple. Roxas and Axel were completely different. Roxas was pissed as much as Axel, but Axel was helping him walk straight, and possibly berating him for being an idiot. Then there was Zexion who handled himself quite well with Demyx, but he could see how close they walked with each other.

“What?” Vanitas asked.

“Nothing, it’s nothing…” Ventus had no idea what was going on, he’ll have to ask once they reach Axel’s.

They were parked close enough to one another, well...at least until Ventus realized he was being pulled toward an unknown black car sitting on the side. It was sleek, new, and holy shit, it was Vanitas’ car.

“I...Uh, I came here with Aqua…”

“Yeah, and she’s not here,” Vanitas said, unlocking the car with the press of a button, the keys clinked together as Vanitas pulled the passenger door open, and forced Ventus into the seat, then closed it.

Ventus pressed his fingers to the window, calling Roxas’ name as he stared right back at him, eyes wide, but he was pulled away from him by Axel. Sora did not seem to notice, nor did Zexion.

What was going on? Why was he in this car?

Vanitas was talking to his friends, then he headed back to the car. Ventus fumbled with the seat belt and wrapped it around himself, and the second Vanitas got into the car, the seat belt clicked together, tightening around Ventus’ chest.

“Y-You’re actually taking me to Axel’s?”

“Where else am I taking you?” Vanitas asked, brows knitted together in confusion as he started the car. “Don’t throw up in my car.”

Ventus nodded, teeth clenched. He didn't feel as high as he had thought he was, but the alcohol was clouding his mind, making his cheeks warm. He quickly took out his phone and to his silent relief, he had texts from his friends.

_Are you being kidnapped? - Roxas._

_Where did you go? - Sora._

_I really don’t think you want to sit with Vanitas of all people. - Zexion._

Ventus grinded his teeth, trying to figure out how to type correctly on his phone.

“Why don’t you answer my texts?” Vanitas asked as he drove away from the street he was previously parked on. He was following Riku who was ahead of them in a silver car.

“I don’t know you,” Ventus answered simply while texting Zexion.

_Is he going to kill me? - Ventus_

He pressed his hands around the phone while looking at the passing buildings. He remained quiet, glancing down at his phone, and calming down Sora who was freaking out, then texting Xion of what was happening with her. She had to give the keys to Terra and was currently in his car with Aqua while they left her car at the park.

_I don’t think so. He’s just...weird. - Zexion._

What the fuck is that supposed to mean? 

Ventus glanced at Vanitas, and noticed he wasn’t paying attention to him. He seemed calm, disinterested. Although, now that Ventus had somewhat relaxed from getting caught yet again, and forced into Vanitas’ car, he had a chance to actually look at Vanitas. At least not in a creepy way.

He seemed a little prickly, but striking in the low light of the city that glinted around them. Ventus couldn’t help but think that the dark suited Vanitas. In the light, there was something more exposing from the dark bags under his already sickly skin, as if he didn’t eat in several days and it didn’t bother him all that much. A hollowness in his gaze, however guarded, even his small stature amongst his friends made him look brittle, the difference was his eyes. Golden, empty, full of uncertainty of what he’s actually thinking about.

“Why...are you staring at me?” Vanitas asked when they stopped at a red light.

Ventus blinked, then he glanced away, a hand to his lips that were spread into a big smile, he had to bite down on his lip to stop the laugh from escaping. He was staring way too long, and now he got caught...again.

“No reason.”

“There has to be,” Vanitas said quietly, a brittle way of speaking as much as his body seemed under the clothes he wore. 

Maybe he had been watching him more than he thought.

“I was just thinking of how...terrifying you are…”

“I scare you?”

“I’m sure that’s what you hope from anyone who comes upon you,” Ventus said, the words slurring, an unbecoming truth twisting on his dry tongue.

Vanitas said nothing, and they stayed quiet longer than Ventus had figured while he texted his friends back. By the time they reached Axel’s house. The house was already bright lights and music blasting through the front door.

Ventus pushed the door open and stepped out of Vanitas’ car. He spotted Kairi waving her hand toward them, a wide drunken smile marred her heart shaped face.

Vanitas pressed a hand to Ventus’ arm and slightly moved him out of the way so he could shut the passenger door, then he locked it. There was a silent moment between them that Ventus wasn’t entirely sure what it was about until Vanitas helped him walk toward the house.

Sora was already at the front steps, embracing Kairi while Riku caught up with him. Namine appeared, calling Axel’s name who had arrived alongside with Roxas, and Vanitas’ friends that were right behind them.

Vanitas stopped to speak to Marluxia and Larxene, while Ventus climbed the steps, and asked Kairi where the alcohol was. The car ride was apparently way too much for Ventus, and he needed to forget how awkward he was.

“Don’t drink too much,” Roxas said as he joined Ventus in the kitchen. He was grabbing one of the bottles he bought earlier and twisted the cap off. Instead of pouring a cup that Ventus had hoped he would’ve done, he tipped his head back and took a rather long swig until Axel appeared.

“Can you not fucking get drunk the second we get here.”

“Hey,” Roxas said, wiping the alcohol from his mouth while pushing the bottle into Ventus’ hand, “fuck off, Axel, I don’t need you always babysitting me.”

“Someone has too, or you’ll throw up in the yard again,” Axel said, sneering down at Roxas.

Ventus ignored their argument and poured himself a cup. Larxene appeared with her own cup, and he poured hers until it was almost spilling over the rim. He sets the bottle down and moves past Larxene who’s shoving Axel away from Roxas. He found Aqua sitting on the leather couch in the living room with Zexion and Demyx, and some other people Ventus didn’t recognize.

They were getting high again, but apparently Zexion had pulled out some stronger stuff, and he gestured for them to head down into Axel’s basement. While the group headed down the steps, Ventus stole one of Aqua’s bottles, and watched her walk off while filling his cup again.

Ventus’ vision was going blurrier by each cup he was downing, and then he found himself lying on the couch, blinking slowly and watching Sora yelling at someone, he was being pulled back by Riku and Axel, then Roxas had punched someone in the face, that’s when Ventus closed his eyes.


	4. Another's Arms

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another's Arms - Coldplay.
> 
> Comments and/or Kudo's are appreciative.

The fourth time Ventus had come upon him was when he was nudged awake, and he found himself staring at Roxas. He did not look happy, and had a split lip. It was quieter than he had thought, and he almost jolted up if it weren’t for Roxas pushing against his chest and leaning down, almost pressing their foreheads together.

“What’s...going on?” Ventus asked.

“I got punched in the face while you were passed out,” Roxas answered in a flat tone. “Axel kicked out a bunch of people...most of the others are passed out besides the ones in the basement. They’re a little fucked up.”

“On alcohol?”

“No.”

“Oh.” Ventus swallowed thickly. “Why are you so close?” 

Roxas sighed, closing his eyes. “I don’t fucking know. Axel’s pissing me off, and he thought I was going to kiss some random idiot in the hallway earlier, and he just freaked the fuck out.”

“In a bad way?”

“I don’t know, he’s Axel.”

“Did he hit you?”

Roxas opened his eyes. “No. He’s just glared at me for the longest time until the chick walked off, and I was left feeling annoyed in the hall.”

“Were you going to kiss her?”

“No, I was buying smokes off of her, and when I found out she had three, I was going to buy more…”

“When was this?”

“About an hour ago.”

Ventus wrinkled his nose, then he pressed his hands on Roxas’s arms and pushed him up, and he sat upright which felt like a bad idea. The nausea hit him in the face in the worst way possible unlike how he felt earlier before he passed out on the couch. “Oh fuck...I think I’m going to throw up.”

“Come to the store with me.”

Ventus nodded, quickly getting up from the couch and frowning at his empty cup on the table, including the bottle. “Who the fuck drank that?”

“Assholes Axel kicked out,” Roxas said, pulling on Ventus’ arm, and while he was dragging him to the front door that was left open, Ventus spotted Vanitas in the kitchen with several of their friends, their eyes met.

“He’s still here?”

“Who?” Roxas asked as he helped Ventus down the steps.

“Vanitas.” It was a lot lighter than he had thought. About six in the morning, the sun was already in the horizon, pushing the darkness away. The air was warm as he and Roxas walked down the dead street toward the store that was two blocks from Axel’s house.

“Who punched you?”

“I don’t know,” Roxas said, sounding tired. “I can barely remember, I think he was freaking out on Sora, and I stepped in since Riku and Axel couldn’t. That’s when Axel kicked out a large portion of—”

Ventus fell off the curb, which did not help in the least when Roxas laughed and helped him to his feet. “Shit.” He looked down at his hands and they were scraped, slightly bleeding, but not too bad. He rubbed off the dirt that stained his hands. 

“Yeah, well, I thought it was a good idea to wake you up since you slept for most of the night,” Roxas said. “And you just got there, so what the fuck? Kind of ruined it.”

“I didn’t mean to,” Ventus said, shrugging off Roxas’ hand. “I guess I was a little weirded out, that’s all.” Then he recalled something he had been thinking about last night. “Are you and Axel dating?”

Roxas scoffed. “He wishes.”

“I’m sure he does.”

Roxas stayed silent for a bit, already fuming by the innocent question. “It’s not the first time that it has crossed my mind. Okay.”

“Okay?”

“And it’s not like I want to date someone who’s always following me around and telling me what to do, and just being a fucking asshole half the time.” Roxas shook his head and glared up at the blue sky. “I just...want him to understand boundaries, you know. And stop pissing me off, I hate being in a fucking hateful mood.”

“Why don’t you tell him that?”

Roxas glared at him. “I never talked with him about dating before.”

“I think he knows that he wants to be with you, he just hasn’t said it because you keep freaking out on him.” 

“I’m not freaking out.”

Ventus glanced at Roxas and caught the glare on his face, but he was focused on the cement. He seemed more angry with himself then with Ventus. Maybe confused by what he wanted.

“Maybe...you should talk to him about this when you’re not...drunk or on drugs.” It was an option that he could think of because Aqua had done the same with Terra. She was an alcoholic in her teens, and when she realized that she liked Terra, she knew that alcohol isn’t really going to help her when she wanted to be serious with her decision. This also meant convincing Terra to stay sober as well, which wasn’t too hard, he rarely cared about drugs or alcohol. He just liked making sure his friends were okay and that they had a driver.

Maybe he should apologize to him.

Roxas sighed deeply. “Yeah, I-I’ll do that…”

They reached the store, bought a pack of smokes, gained a compliment about Roxas and Ventus looking like twins before they left. They walked back to Axel’s, mostly Roxas updating Ventus about what he had missed while he was passed out. When they reached the house, Roxas was waving the cigarettes at Xion and Kairi. 

Ventus sat back on the couch where he had been sitting earlier, and laid down. He was still tired, his head hurt, and he was surprised he hadn’t thrown up on their way to the store and when they headed back. He was still nauseous which was giving him the idea that he should drink more, but the thought itself was making him sick.

“Ventus.”

He hummed, opening his eyes and looked at Vanitas who was standing before the couch, hands in his pockets. “What?”

“You should sleep in Axel’s bedroom,” Vanitas said, and he reached down for Ventus’ arm, and pulled him up.

“Where is he?”

“Downstairs,” Vanitas said, then pulled Ventus to his feet. He was still a little drunk, and staggered a bit against Vanitas. His hands tingled, and his heart raced, a small voice in the back of his mind told him not to touch Vanitas, and because of it, he almost jerked back before Vanitas pulled him close and began helping him down the hall toward the single room.

The room itself was clean to an extent. A black curtain covered the window, and to the right side of the room sat a clothing rack that had Axel’s dark clothes, while the bed itself was queen size with a dark red blanket covering it, with black pillows.

It looked soft, and felt soft when he landed on it, and Ventus blinked his eyes up at Vanitas who was pulling the blanket so Ventus can get underneath. His shoes were tossed to the side.

“Where are you going?”

“I want to make sure my friends aren’t fucked up,” Vanitas replied. “I might drive them home soon if they are.”

Ventus wasn’t sure what he was meant to feel besides disappointment if Vanitas left. He didn’t know him at all, but he was strangely drawn to him. Like a magnet, their eyes met across a room, and all Ventus wanted him to do was stay. Even now, he wanted him to remain inside the room, but all he did was watch Vanitas walk out, the door closing quietly behind him.

“Shit,” Ventus said under his breath, fingers gripping the blanket. His cheeks were warm, tingling, the same with his beating heart. He couldn’t deny it. He was attracted to him. And he didn’t really know why, maybe it just happened. He wanted to know him, and it was getting to him, and this was getting a lot more intense with each encounter they found themselves in.

Did he feel it? It didn’t seem like he did.

Ventus turned on his side and closed his eyes. Maybe when he wakes up, Vanitas will be gone, and he won’t see him again. Maybe all those feelings will fade. His heart ached at the thought, chest caving in, teeth gritted, the nausea was rolling in again. He shouldn’t think about that, it’s not like it meant anything. They were strangers, that’s all.

Ventus fell asleep quickly and when he woke up, it wasn’t the way that he had hoped. He fell off the bed, and it wasn’t his fault exactly. There was a loud gasp, followed by a drawn out moan, smooth and purposeful as the bed moved.

Ventus sniffed, then he glanced toward the bed and frowned at the two figures in the dark. Their bodies shifting together, naked skin appearing from the slivers of morning light leaking in through Axel’s curtains.

 _Shit. Why me? Why now? What the fuck? Do they not know whose house this is?_ Ventus thought while crawling toward the door, grasping his shoes as he went. The moment he left, the grunting and moaning was growing louder until he closed the door behind him, and slowly stood by using the wall as leverage.

He slipped his shoes on and walked down the hall, hand on the wall, still dizzy from the alcohol in his system. He caught sight of Namine on the couch with Xion. Kairi was in the kitchen with Roxas, Axel, Aqua, and Terra. They were playing cards. He didn’t know where Sora and Riku had gone too, or Zexion and Demyx. The house seemed dead as he staggered toward them, gaining smiles from the group.

“You woke up again,” Roxas said, grinning at Ventus.

“Did you sleep well?” Aqua asked.

Ventus nodded, blinking a few times as he placed his hands on the table and smiled sheepishly at Axel. “There’s people fucking in your room.”

Axel frowned. “On my bed?”

“They’re the reason I woke up,” Ventus said while Axel was getting up, throwing his cards on the table, “they pushed me off, and started...fucking.”

Roxas gritted his teeth, then he dropped his cards, earning a _yes_ from Kairi as she grinned at Aqua. He followed after Axel, then the bedroom door was slammed open, and he started yelling at the people in his room.

“I’m sorry,” Ventus said, looking at Terra, “for what happened the last time I got high in a park...for running off like a fucking idiot.”

“You could’ve got hit by a car,” Terra said.

Ventus nodded, he hadn’t thought about that. “I’m sorry, truly, I am, Terra.”

Terra got up and hugged Ventus, then they all turned around to watch Axel kick out the two who were having sex in his bed. The girl looked annoyed, and the guy was gripping her hand, swearing at Axel.

The door to Axel’s basement opened, and Vanitas appeared, his hand on his cellphone that was placed to his ear. He glanced at Axel, then toward the group, and Ventus felt that instant connection when their eyes met then Vanitas headed down the hall to continue his conversation.

“He’s still here?”

“He got a cab for Marluxia and Xehanort when they got blacked out drunk, but they ran off, and Larxene had to look for them,” Aqua said with a sigh. “She took them home.”

“What happened to Saix?”

“He headed home around four in the morning,” Terra said, placing down a card.

Roxas walked back over to them while Axel was standing in the doorway of his house, arguing with the two drunks.

“Where’s Sora and Zexion?” Ventus asked while Roxas took out a cigarette, and waved at Kairi for her lighter.

“They left about an hour ago,” Roxas said.

Kairi smiled. “Riku’s always been overprotective, and Demyx tried passing out in the back yard, so Zexion had to take him home.”

“Who drove them?”

“I did,” Aqua said, yawning. “Don’t worry about it, Ven, I sobered up around seven.”

Ventus sighed, his eyes still burned, and he felt a little sluggish. “I need the bathroom.” He walked toward the hall, ignored Vanitas who was on the phone, and walked into the bathroom. He took a piss, washed his hands, then his face, and almost wanted to fall asleep on the floor. This night was too much for him, he wanted to go home to his bed and sleep. 

There was a knock on the door, and Ventus sniffled, then he dried his hands with the towel and opened the door. 

Vanitas stood in front of him, tucking his phone in his sweater pocket. “Do you need a ride home?”

“You’re offering?” Ventus asked, sounding skeptical.

“Yeah, unless you want to stay here.”

Ventus grimaced at the thought. “No, I don’t want to stay here.” He rubbed his eyes, and when he dropped his hands, he caught Vanitas’ smile curved upon his lips before he started walking down the hall, Ventus following behind him.

“Vanitas is taking me home,” Ventus said to his friends while Vanitas spoke to Axel at the front door.

“Like...taking, _taking_ you home?” Roxas asked, arching a brow.

Ventus frowned. “No, he’s just driving me home. I’m fucking tired, okay, I just want to go home.”

“Take a sip before you do,” Kairi offered, passing him her cup of...Vodka?

Ventus reached for it, and took a long drink which earned a smile from Roxas, a glare from Kairi, and a card from Aqua who dropped it into the pile. He passed it back to her, barely empty, only a small sip, which she changed by pulling out the bottle she was hiding under the table.

He waved at his friends before walking toward Vanitas who was at the bottom of the stairs, already sauntering to his car. Axel was still standing in the doorway, the drunk people who soiled his bed were gone from the front yard.

“He seems a bit...piqued.”

“What do you mean?” Ventus asked, reaching for the iron railing. 

“About you.”

“He’s just driving me home, for fuck sakes,” Ventus said, mostly under his breath. He wasn’t trying to be antagonistic, and maybe mornings annoy him when he’s swimming in alcohol, it’s not like he wanted to get angry at any of his friends.

Axel chuckled, taking Ventus’ hand and helping him down the steps. “Vanitas is rarely interested in anyone, he finds mostly a lot of people annoying.”

“He has friends…”

“Yeah, and he likes certain types, so what? But it’s not like I want to date anyone in that fucking house besides one who shares the same hair and eye color as you.” Axel frowned while Ventus gave him a _what the fuck_ look.

“Don’t compare me and Roxas, we’re not the same.”

“No, of course not, I’m just saying,” Axel said, sardonically. “Vanitas has friends, but it doesn’t mean he wants to fuck them.”

Ventus shook his head, then he waved his hand as he staggered over to Vanitas’ car. He did not want to think about sex at the moment. Nor did he want to wake up to it, but shit happens. He opened the passenger door and sat down, the second he closed it, Vanitas was already starting the car.

“What did Axel tell you?”

Ventus leaned against the window, watching the sunlight stream through the branches above as they drove down the street. “Nothing interesting…” He almost wants to keep his eyes open, listening to music from the radio that isn’t as interesting, and Ventus is drowning everything out until he’s slowly closing his eyes, and all he wants to do is sink into the smell of peppermint that clings to Vanitas.

His thoughts are paper thin when the door is jerked open, and Ventus almost falls if it weren’t for a hand gripping his shoulder, steadying him, and the seat belt that Vanitas was taking off of him. The scent is strong, mixing with something sweet, with the faint trace of sweat and cigarette’s.

“How...do you know where I live?”

“I asked Axel, and he told me,” Vanitas answered, pulling Ventus to his feet, then slamming the door shut. He helped Ventus walk toward his apartment. A simple brown and white building that didn’t really look interesting all that much. The walls were thin, the people inside were quiet, and Ventus never had parties because he knows for sure someone will get arrested, and he’d rather not witness that...again.

“Why do you smell like peppermint?” he finally asks, mostly because the halls are dry, and they have to walk up two flights of stairs, Vanitas quietly swearing either to himself or to Ventus, he doesn’t know.

“I was eating gum earlier when I looked for Marluxia and Xehanort.”

They reached his floor and walked down the hall. It really felt stale inside the hall, it itched under his clothes.

“I thought only Larxene chased after them.”

“Were you awake for that?” Vanitas asked.

“No.”

“Then you don’t know anything, so don’t assume shit.”

Ventus frowned while taking out his keys. “Well, I’m sorry, my friends must’ve been completely uninformed since they were awake during that entire issue.”

He unlocked the door, and for a second, Ventus thought Vanitas was going to leave. Their conversation was spiked with annoyance, well on Ventus’ part, not Vanitas.

“Uh, thanks?” Ventus said, looking back at Vanitas.

“I want to make sure you don’t die.” Vanitas walked into the apartment, and Ventus closed the door, kicking his shoes off.

“In my own apartment?”

Vanitas was looking around. There really wasn’t anything interesting. He had a simple brown couch, a brown coffee table, a TV sitting against the wall. A balcony he only sits in when he wants to smoke his cigarette’s, or talk to his friends on the phone. He thinks that he lives a rather boring life without his friends, and if he never had them, he’d probably wouldn’t have the issues he has now, but he doesn’t really mind drowning in it all the same. 

Is it a bad thing or a good thing? Maybe he should ask his therapist.

Ventus drags the sweater off his shoulders and drops it on his bedroom floor. His bed isn’t as nice as Axel’s, and it has never had people fucking in it, which Ventus is quite relieved. He had people _sleep_ in it, mostly Sora, Xion, Roxas, and sometimes Aqua. It’s usually when they want to have a friendly night drinking without heavily consuming the alcohol until they’re all fucking up at a bar. 

Vanitas appears in the doorway of his bedroom. He doesn’t say anything, and Ventus is somewhat getting what he actually wants, and maybe it’s wishful thinking until Ventus lays back and this time he reaches his hand out toward Vanitas.

Maybe it is wishful thinking.

“Come, sleep with me.”

Vanitas doesn’t say anything, he takes off his sweater, his shoes had been left at the front, and then he lies down with Ventus. And Ventus’ heart is pounding inside his chest because he’s not sure if this is a dream, or something fucking stupid they both decided to do since Ventus is still somewhat drunk, at least he doesn’t want to throw up anymore.

Vanitas, however, feels nice in his arms. His body pressed against him until they’re kicking at the blankets, then they’re wrapped up beneath it. Ventus doesn’t have a black curtain to block out the sun, but the dark blue curtain is enough to let in enough light that it looks almost grey inside the room.

It feels right, or maybe it’s the alcohol, and the rough activity that happened during the night when Roxas was punched in the face, and Sora was yelling at random people, and Ventus finding himself on the floor when two people decided to have sex on Axel's bed before they were chased out. 

Ventus leans against Vanitas, almost as if he can’t get enough of him, that he needs to curl his fingers into the fabric of Vanitas’ black t-shirt, inhaling the scent of him like an idiot, but Vanitas is rubbing his back, and it feels nice, and he’s chuckling low in his throat while Ventus swims in both alcohol and whatever is going on between them.

“You smell nice…”

“I can’t say the same for you,” Vanitas murmurs.

Ventus tastes the slight embarrassment on his tongue. “I’ll shower when I wake up.” 

Vanitas hums. 

“Will you be here when I wake up?” Ventus wonders, hoping for both a no and yes, somewhat of a maybe.

“I don’t know.”

Ventus wrinkles his nose. It won’t be the first time he wakes up alone, but this hurts a bit more, even if he doesn’t know Vanitas like he knew many people before. Maybe he wants to know him, because the intensity of the silence between them is so thick, and he can’t get rid of it, and he doesn’t even know what it is. Attraction. He can’t say he’s sexually interested, but it’s somewhat there, although shallow in the back of his mind, and there’s other things he wants, and it’s such a bad time to even think about it. 

He wants to kiss Vanitas, he wants to wake up to him, and he wants him to stop staring at him from across a room like he can’t do the same.

“Wake me when you leave,” Ventus whispers. Their legs are intertwined, bodies pressed together, Ventus’ shirt has somewhat ridden up when Vanitas was rubbing his back, and Ventus is leaned against Vanitas’ chest, his head beneath his chin.

“Maybe.” There’s amusement in his voice. “Go to sleep, Ventus.”

Ventus hums, closing his eyes, enjoying the feeling of having Vanitas in his bed, hoping he won’t forget the feeling. Will this happen again? He doesn’t know. There isn’t even an answer to what the fuck is going on, and he’s to tired to ask or even to answer it.

Ventus falls asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When I was seventeen, I had this best friend of mine, and we would sleep together (not sex, just sleep). We would get drunk, and that's what would happen. And he'd rub my back, and we'd wake up and drink, then sleep, and that was about it for 3 months. I never seen him again after that. I never really looked for sex from others, I was never interested in it as a teenager, which sometimes makes me think that is the reason why I can't seem to write romance correctly. Cause I'm not interested in it. 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed.
> 
> Comments and/or Kudo's are appreciative.


	5. desperate intoxication

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a lot longer than it should be...and I thought it was going to be the last chapter, that's why it's so long, but...  
> LOL. 
> 
> I hope you enjoy.
> 
> Comments and/or Kudo's are appreciated.

The fifth time he had come upon _him_ was almost a month after. Ventus had time to himself to ask the simple questions of what it meant to feel attracted to a stranger, and at the same time, know them completely. It was like he had always known Vanitas. He hadn’t awoken him the day he left, but Ventus did find a text message. Since then, he’s been keeping his distance, and spending time in school and his friends.

Four weeks past, and Ventus had said no for the third time to his friends whenever they asked if he wanted to drink, or get high. He didn’t want to do that. It wasn’t exactly _growing up_ since adults usually drink into their late twenties and up. He was just losing interest in throwing up in the mornings, and feeling as if he were dying, all shaky limbed and weak. It was not a routine he wanted to get used to.

Which made little sense why he decided to follow Axel, Roxas, and Xion to yet another party. They walked along the street around nine at night, the four of them had their own cash on them, and someone to call if they needed to get picked up.

“Zexion’s already there, right?” Ventus asked as they drew near a small crowd around a brick building, three stories high, it looked vintage from the faded text on the sides. From what Ventus knew, Xehanort, Saix, and Marluxia checked out the place via a guy named Xigbar. Apparently there were allowed to use it for the week, and Axel was asked by Marluxia to come along, and Axel said he’d only go if he could bring some people.

“Yeah,” Axel replied, hands tucked inside his black pants. “He arrived about two hours ago with Demyx and Larxene.”

Roxas said something under his breath about Larxene. Ventus wasn’t sure why he disliked her, but Ventus wasn’t exactly fond for her either. She may look sweet on the outside, but she had a sharp anger that was triggered by anything. She was skinny and tall, but she could hold herself against mostly anyone. Her own presence is what intimidated others.

They weaved through the crowd until Axel pulled Roxas, a subtle touch, fingers curling around his wrist. There was no resistance from Roxas who had fought against being led like this in the past. He always had a problem about something when it came to Axel, but maybe they finally talked over their feelings.

Xion walked behind them and in front of Ventus, she wore a black and white dress that made her look younger than she is, her cropped black hair didn’t help all that much. She was looking at her phone, the white light brightened the grasping darkness around them. She was the one who drove them here, keeping her car two blocks away just in case. It was nice out, a warm wind under the blotted out stars.

Axel waved at Riku who was standing at the side door. He had some people around him as well, not as many Ventus recognized. He blew out the smoke and pulled the heavy door open, letting in the group before closing it behind him.

The hallway was dim and there was the sharp sweet smell in the air, joined by the cigarette smoke between Riku’s fingers. Ventus guessed he was wearing cologne. He was wearing a long black coat that was unzipped, and beneath it was a white t-shirt, and black jeans, rips on the knees. His shoes were new, black and white converse. 

“Where’s Sora?” Roxas asked, looking over his shoulder.

“At the bar,” Riku said indifferently. “You know how he is, he likes a good drink.”

Ventus can hardly hear their conversation, and he almost finds himself zoning them out as he follows them down the long hallway until the cold becomes warmer, and there’s more people showing up, several who are already drunk, others that are sober and their eyes linger on one another.

He sometimes feels their eyes on him when they’re not actually looking at him. He feels it on his back, as if they’re judging him for being smaller, younger, with a soft face and no sign of anger in his eyes. He isn’t sure why he thinks this way. The thought burns at his fingertips, making his palms sweaty, and his sweater uncomfortable.

Maybe it was a bad idea that he followed his friends here. Everyone was a stranger, and it was making him uncomfortable.

They enter a large room, the ceiling high, the lights a warm orange on the sides. There were tables on the sides, a platform that led to the bar counter where most of the people were standing around. All of them looked so much older than his friends, and Ventus almost wondered if he was even meant to be here. 

“Ven!”

He glanced around and spotted Zexion sitting at a table with Demyx and Larxene. There’s several shots in front of Larxene, while Demyx is sipping on a glass of Whiskey from the looks of it. Zexion has some kind of margarita sitting beside his phone.

Axel, Roxas, and Xion are already heading through the crowd as Ventus slips by a tall man with jet black hair, and he stands almost awkwardly beside Zexion who raises his drink, offering Ventus a sip.

He shakes his head. “I don’t want any.”

Zexion frowned. “Is there something you do want?” He placed his glass down, then was struggling to reach for the chair behind him. Ventus helped, and sat down, his body was still turned toward him, and Demyx looked slightly rejected by this. “Onion rings? Fries? A burger?”

“Onion rings,” Ventus says.

Zexion grinned, and he reached over to Larxene and told him what Ventus wanted. She didn’t look as perturbed as he thought and leaned over while she was getting up from her chair.

“If you see Marluxia, make sure he stays here, I still need my money back.” Then she’s off through the crowd, almost shoving a guy to the side who had stood in her way, then she disappeared amongst the group crowding the bar.

“Where’s Sora?” Ventus asked.

“Somewhere over there,” Zexion waves his hand, then he’s drinking his margarita. 

Ventus knows for sure he’s high, and when he pulls out something from inside his coat, he plops it inside his glass and smiles at Ventus. “It’s a party, Ven, you can’t just keep looking like a kicked puppy.”

“Are you selling here too?” Ventus asked, hoping to change the subject.

Zexion shakes his head, passing something to Demyx who gladly takes it, then he reached for one of Larxene’s shot, and hands it to Zexion. Ventus watched Demyx drop whatever Zexion had given to him into his drink. It was quick as Demyx downed the rest of his drink, and he smiles merrily at the ceiling as he sits back against his chair.

“I’d rather not,” Zexion says, leaning close while placing something inside the shot glass, then offering it to Ventus, “there’s already people doing that on the balcony upstairs, and a few in the basement. I don’t want my name getting out, they might steal me for all I’m worth, and I’m here to party, not fuck up my night.”

Ventus stared down at the shot glass and the strong scent of Vodka that was already upsetting his stomach. “I don’t want that.”

Zexion rolled his eyes, “You’re at a party, Ven, and what I’m giving you inside the shot will help you mellow out.” He placed the shot in front of him and leaned back against his chair. “When have you ever denied yourself a drink?”

_Since I started asking about my sanity._

Ventus ignored the shot once Larxene returned, and she arched a brow at the glass once she placed the bowl down. She plucked an onion ring out and ate it as she sat back down.

“No Marluxia?” she asked, nudging Demyx before noticing the dazed look in his eyes. “You gave him something?”

“I gave him more than I should’ve,” Zexion said, frowning at Demyx. “He’ll be fucked up for the night."

“Great," she said sarcastically.

Ventus chews on the onion rings, the spice and heat fills his mouth, while he explores the room, looking for his friends in the crowd of strangers. He does spot Sora and Riku across the room, they head out into another hall, disappearing under the warm light. Roxas and Axel are sitting at another table with Xion, they’re knocking back shot after shot, and Ventus grimaces at what he’ll have to deal with once they’re drunk.

“Have you seen Saix?” Ventus asked, something to say in the quiet inside his head.

“He went upstairs about...two hours ago,” Zexion responded, his words slurring, drawn out, a smile makes it to his lips, while his glassy eyes glint off the lights across from them. “Xehanort’s downstairs, no women in that area.”

“Fuckers,” Larxene says, then she takes her last shot. She looks at the one in front of Ventus, and raises a brow at him, a silent question which he barely answers when he spots someone in the crowd near the bar.

His figure is subtle amongst the others since he isn’t as tall as most of the people over there, but he is hanging around Marluxia, and this makes him distinct. He’s wearing a black sweater and Ventus spots red beneath that. The light makes the shadows on his face a little more deeper, hollow, and his gaze is empty, emotionless, as if he doesn’t care about anyone else in the room, and he’d rather be anywhere else.

And then he does something that harms Ventus’ heart. It’s sudden, tightening his throat, breath lodged, and words are fatal. He’d do anything for their eyes not to meet even across the room, and as much as Ventus hoped he didn’t, but he sticks out with his blonde hair beside Zexion who’s lolling his head back and eating an onion ring.

Ventus picks up the shot glass, and to Larxene’s annoyance, he knocks it back completely, ignoring both the awful taste of Vodka, and whatever the fuck Zexion had put inside that had already dissolved into a eerie shade that wasn’t clear. He slides the glass toward Larxene, and feels _his_ eyes burning the side of his face as he says, “Buy me more.” And he’s passing her money, and then he leans over to Zexion, turning his body slightly, and he asks for more of whatever he had given him.

Zexion turns his head slightly and grins lazily at him. “Oh, I have a lot, and much more once we get to some air, it’s so fucking hot.” He passes him his margarita while they wait for Larxene, and as Ventus almost drinks most of it, just to feel something less than embarrassment or shame or some other kind of emotion he can’t identify while his entire body warms beneath his clothes.

He finally gets the courage to look toward where _he_ was standing. He’s no longer there, and Ventus can’t help it that he feels like a hypocrite. He knew he was going to see him here, but there was the small chance he wasn’t going to run into him. That they weren’t going to talk, or anything. And then now, that’s all Ventus wants to do.

“You’re an open book,” Zexion says once Larxene arrived, and she gave Ventus most of the shots, keeping two for herself.

“What do you mean?” Ventus asks, taking the first shot and grimacing at the harsh taste burning his throat before he pushed the empty glass forward, then picked up another. He needed to get drunk, that’s all he wanted to do, nothing else, just so he could pretend he wasn’t a coward.

Larxene takes her shots in stride, a confident smile on her lips as she leans forward, watching him take another.

“You saw him, and you freaked out,” Zexion says, leaning close to him. “I’m not blind, Ven.”

Ventus laughs nervously, then he drinks another, and glances at Demyx who is slowly blinking his eyes closed. “Maybe you should focus on your _boyfriend_ instead of me.”

Zexion turns to Demyx and starts nudging him awake, and to Ventus’ surprise since he was actually teasing Zexion, he instead finds him kissing Demyx, trailing delicate fingers down his face.

Ventus looks away, then he passes a shot to Larxene who raises the glass and he clinks his last one with hers, then they both drink it, simultaneously placing the empty glasses on the table.

“I’ll get us some more,” Larxene suggests.

“No, we’re heading upstairs,” Zexion says, pulling Demyx to his feet. “Are you coming with?”

“I want to see what the fuck Axel is doing,” Larxene said, glancing behind her at the trio sitting at a table a few feet away from them.

Zexion nods, then he’s somehow getting Demyx to walk correctly as Ventus follows after him. Standing up was wrong, walking was much worse, the room swayed, the smell of alcohol, sweat, sweetness and decay is thick in the air, and it reminds him of all the nights he finds himself wandering by himself in a fog that never lets up. A morning when his legs hurt, a bruise on his shoulder, blood in his mouth, alcohol so substantial that it lingers in his system that he almost thinks that it won’t ever fade away.

He was stuck on the morning when he swallowed aspirin and chased it down with cold water from a container in his fridge. He loved the taste of medicine, maybe he was used to it from the many times he spent talking to a counsellor, to a therapist, to someone expressing depression out of loneliness and hate, while the alcohol burns and fades, and the drugs comes and goes, and Ventus sits in his empty apartment trying to recall when he felt right in the mind without the arms of the one who stains his skin and smells strong of peppermint.

His heart aches, and he doesn’t want to speak the truth between his bitten, numb lip and knows for sure that if he does, it’ll be more than he truly wants to confess.

_Not now. Please, not now, you’re not mine, and I’m not yours, and it hurts because it’s all I ever wanted until the bed was cold without you._

Zexion, Demyx, and Ventus climb the stairs and they set Demyx down on a black leather bench in the hall while the air itself on this floor is thicker and much more exhausting. He knows what it’s from, the acrid taste, sweet and addicting that Ventus hardly cares if he’s small, that he’s not as fierce as most people in his life, that he wants one thing to stop him from thinking and feeling, so he won’t be scared anymore.

Saix is up here with Xehanort, the both of them are near the railing, cigarette’s between their fingers, but it might be something else by the hazy look on Xehanort’s face, while a group of people hang around them. Ventus recognizes druggies when he sees them. They’re all starving for more, like strange dark monsters coming from the crevices of the shadows, baring before the light of the artificial light, stained by its intoxication in their weak limbs and dry mouths.

Zexion pulls him away from them, he keeps his head down, then they’re inside a parlor room where a group of people are hanging around a billiards table, and Zexion quickly speaks to a group of people, giving them cheerful smiles and bright eyes, and it’s established that they also know who he is.

“Ventus,” Zexion says, gesturing for him to follow him toward the back where the light is slightly dimmed upon the maroon colored carpet. They sit at a lone table with two bar chairs. “Stay here. I know a guy, and he’ll be able to give me more, and possibly something else to make our night much more fun.”

Ventus nods, hardly interested in how Zexion gets whatever he’s about to buy and sits down on the chair. Then Zexion is heading off somewhere across the room, and Ventus sits by himself, fingertips tapping against the smooth table.

He’s too numb to think straight, and he counts the seconds, the minutes, until Zexion comes back with a tall glass of Vodka?

“Tequila,” Zexion answers as he sets it down and grins at Ventus. He can already tell that Zexion had taken something while he was gone. His eyes are glassy, skin clammier, and he’s looser in demeanor.

“Is it in the glass?” 

Zexion nods, “It’s good shit, Ven. It’ll get you fucked up the way that you oh so fucking want...I mean, I get it, you know, you want to forget about—”

Ventus rolls his eyes at Zexion’s fake comforting voice, and reached for the glass. “Stop, okay, I don’t need this shit, not tonight.”

“He’s here though, and I’m not stupid.”

“I’m not saying you’re stupid,” Ventus tells him, then he takes a sip and the tequila’s not mixed, and it’s so fucking strong that he can’t help but hate it and love it.

Zexion laughs as he pulls the drink back, then he tips his chin up and takes a long drink while Ventus taps his fingers, watching and waiting patiently.

It’s so cowardly, but he can’t help it, and he just wants whatever the fuck Zexion can give him. Then Zexion passes it to him, and tells him to follow him back to Demyx. They leave the parlor room, and walk down the hall, and Ventus cringes when he spots _him_ at the end with Marluxia, Larxene, and Axel. They’re standing near Demyx who is still passed out on the bench, Axel has an arm wrapped around his shoulders, a grin pulls at the corner of his lips until he notices Zexion and Ventus walking towards them.

Ventus steps beside Zexion as they walk by _him_ , Marluxia, and Larxene so they can stand in front of Axel and Demyx.

“Where’s Roxas and Xion?” Ventus asked, anything to get rid of the pressure on his shoulders, in his head, in his heart that races against his ribcage as if its trying to break free.

“Bathroom,” Axel says, and he waves at the drink in Ventus’ hand, and Ventus doesn’t want to let go of the drink, it’s a subtle life line to his pain and cowardly feelings that leave scars in his throat.

Ventus takes a long drink of the alcohol, then he passes it to Axel, and says to Zexion, “I’m going to find Roxas and Xion.” He nods as he sits down beside Demyx, speaking in hush whispers that are blocked out from the voices that penetrate all over the place.

Ventus twists around and he walks by _him_ and the cold night is so inviting that he wants to walk toward it, but he saunters into the heat of the dull light, fingers tucked into his pockets, teeth biting down on his dry mouth. Oh, he wants more, a lot more to make his entire mind numb, so the walls and floors and all the people blend together until they’re all unrecognizable.

He searched for Roxas and Xion until he finds him standing beside the door, a beer in his hand, and Ventus calls his name, and Roxas waves the beer with a cheeky smile spread upon his face.

“How long has she been in there?”

“Too long,” Roxas answered, rapping his knuckles against the wood. “Xion. Are you okay?”

There’s silence, well, not silence, but it’s there and Roxas heard something that Ventus didn’t, then he twists the knob and they slip inside. Ventus is somewhat surprised that the bathroom has a lock, but more surprised to see Xion sitting on the tile floor against the white smooth wall.

She’s drunk, consumed by it completely that her drunken smile is kind, and her glassy eyes are sweet.

They sit with her under the strange white light that somehow makes the bathroom a fading blue.

“Are you okay?” Roxas asked, sounding sober than Ventus and Xion, he holds his beer and takes a swig then passes it to her trembling fingers.

“I’m...perfect,” she drawls, closing her eyes and takes a sip, barely tipping her head back against the wall before passing it back, but Roxas gestures to Ventus who happily reaches for it. “I threw up…”

Ventus takes a sip while Roxas nods, “Yeah, we know, well...I know.”

“We weren’t here long,” Ventus remarked, and remembered he didn’t come with them.

“I drank a lot,” Xion said, pushing herself up a bit with her back against the wall. “And it was fun, and I’m sick, and my fingers are numb.”

“Should I text Kairi to come get you?” Roxas asked, already taking out his cellphone.

Xion is shaking her head, and Roxas sighs as Ventus passes him the can. He drinks the rest of it while Ventus lies down on the floor. He’s so numb, he understands what Xion feels, but he can’t help and enjoy it. Maybe his therapist was right, maybe this wasn’t a good coping mechanism for his issues.

Roxas texts Axel and tells him where they are, and Xion is playing music on her phone. It’s not pop to Ventus’ surprise, and he stares at the ceiling as the rock music is played at a low volume that it somehow feels strangely comforting to him. 

After a minute or so, Roxas is getting to his feet, barely staggering as he walks toward the door and opens it up. Ventus isn’t paying attention as Axel’s voice fills the room, and Xion’s smiling wide at him and he helps her to her feet.

“You okay, sweetheart?”

“Perfect, I’m so fucking perfect,” Xion says, leaning against him.

“I think we should go,” Roxas says to him.

Ventus watched them as their conversation becomes whispers and secrets between them as Xion closes her eyes against Axel. Then he heard someone clearing their throat, and Ventus barely tips his head, bending his back, and Axel looks to the door.

“Are you going to take care of him?”

“Yeah.” _He_ steps in Ventus’ view, talking to Axel, and Ventus is hardly quick as he tries to get up, Roxas is already at his side, helping him to his feet.

“We’re heading out, and Zexion’s already dealing with Demyx,” he says, shaking his head. “You’ll be fine,” he looks at _him,_ “you called Aqua and Terra, right?”

“Five minutes ago.”

“Ven,” Roxas said, looking into his hazy eyes, “Aqua and Terra are coming to pick you up, okay.”

Ventus is shaking his head. He didn’t want anyone’s help. He wanted to get drunk, drugged, to feel nothing in this empty world, and now he’s swearing and Roxas is no longer holding him, and instead he turns and meets golden irises that makes Ventus go still. His arm wraps around Ventus’ side, the other is holding his wrist, soft and sure, yet strong enough to support his weight.

“You’re okay,” Vanitas tells him as they walk out of the bathroom. Xion is going on about something with Axel and Roxas as they head off the other way, and Ventus almost calls for them, but they’re heading in the opposite direction.

“I’m fine,” Ventus said, squirming.

“No, you’re not,” Vanitas said, “you’re drunk, and Zexion said you’re on some drug...took too much, can’t handle your shit.”

Ventus glared, the words hit him and it feels as if he’s being belittled, which he is, and it hurts. “I don’t need you helping me.”

“You do, you really fucking do.” Then a door down the hall opens and Ventus steps inside. To his surprise, the room is empty with a couch against the wall, a light on the opposite end in the corner, with a window that is somewhat left open. There’s also the strong odor of cigarette smoke drifting in the air.

Vanitas lets him go and Ventus staggered to the couch, then he sits down, fingers curling, unable to look at _him_. He didn’t want it to end like this, he didn’t even want to come to this conclusion when he decided to drink and take whatever Zexion was offering to him.

“Why are you pissed off?” Vanitas asked, keeping his distance. “You won’t even look at me.”

“It’s nothing,” Ventus says, his words searing on his tongue. “I just want to drink, not be taken home like a fucking child.”

“You’re acting like a child,” Vanitas said after a second.

Ventus knows for sure he’s pouting, but he’s staring at the floor stubbornly, not willing himself to give in.

“Tell me,” Vanitas said, taking a step closer, and the proximity makes Ventus shudder and he hopes _he_ didn’t notice it, “you’re mad...and every time…I know you notice me...it’s so obvious, and you’re mad, and it’s making me fucking mad.”

Ventus bites down on his lip, closing off the words creeping up his throat like little insects. He won’t give in, he won’t speak the words that feel like hate to him, he wanted to drown them in alcohol, the drug that makes his body loose and free, but the confines of this room with the one person he didn’t want to speak to is what’s bothering him.

Vanitas sighs deeply, and then he decides to stab Ventus, not literally. “I’m guessing you’re mad because I didn’t tell you I was leaving.”

That was weeks ago, and Ventus had to swallow the curse that’s lodged in his throat, but it hurts and he almost wants to cry, and to his fucking horror, he’s wiping away a stray tear that has slid down his numb cheek.

“It’s not that…”

“It is.” Vanitas sits down beside him, and he moves closer, and Ventus tenses because all of his control is loosening up, and a part of his mind is telling him to fuck it all, but he can’t, he’s a coward, he’s scared of romance, and he’s scared of Vanitas. He has never felt this way, this unknown sensation of looking at a stranger and wanting them in a way that seemed somehow abnormal.

The romantic sense than the sexual. To kiss and touch, to sleep, and not have sex, and to be overwhelmed with wanting to be needed on an everyday basis. Not everyone wants that, so why should Ventus tell him about them when it could be nothing but wishful thinking.

“It was weeks ago,” Ventus says, trying to make himself angry. “Let it go, it has nothing to do with that. I just want to drink, and do drugs, and maybe go home and…”

“And what?” Vanitas asked, his voice tight, “fuck someone, or have a hangover the next morning, snort crushed up pills, drink coffee with your alcohol, and do it all over again? And pretend that you’re—”

Ventus turned, and glared at Vanitas, and his control is falling between his fingers like a soft ribbon. “Fuck you, it has nothing to do with that, but if it did, why the fuck didn’t you wake me up? I hate waking up alone!” It’s so petulant, and he knows he’s stabbing himself with a knife, severing out veins and bones, tearing out a part of him that should be for his therapist, not for _him_.

He hates him.

And Ventus is standing up, even though his world is tipping, but Vanitas is staring at him, but there’s no smug look on his face and he’s genuinely listening to him as Ventus slowly and surely breaks down into small unbearable pieces.

“I don’t know you, and I can’t help it, okay...for some reason, you just show up, and I look for you, and I hate it, I hate you, I don’t fucking know why the fuck I like you, and it hurts, I just want to get drunk and go home and pretend that I won’t see you again.” Ventus is breathing hard, and he’s wiping tears from his face. “I don’t care about you, you make me want things that I can’t have, and I fucking hate it. I hate you, I hate you, I hate you!”

Vanitas is standing, and he takes Ventus’ shaking, twitchy, hands, and he presses his mouth to his knuckles, and Ventus gasps, teeth gritted, heart racing. He closes his eyes and bites down on his bottom lip. It’s all overwhelming, and he sees Vanitas’ smile forming on his mouth, and all Ventus’ wants to do is run away and hide somewhere.

“You always show up when I desperately want to see you,” Vanitas says and he steps closer, and Ventus moves back until he’s trapped between Vanitas and the wall, “and I want to find you, and I want to text you, and talk to you, and I also think it’s kind of stupid, because I like you a lot, maybe it’s a connection, love at first sight, a crush that won’t go away, but I want you.”

Ventus is rigid, vulnerable, like glass about to shatter under the pressure. “You left, you could’ve...said something, woken me up…”

Vanitas chuckled, pressing their foreheads together, “And _you_ could have answered all of my text messages and phone calls, but I see the only way I can ever see you is at parties, so I asked _our_ mutual friends to get you to come to one of them.”

So, this isn’t just Ventus’ fault.

He opens his eyes and he looks into Vanitas’, and he glares subtly at him, before pulling him closer, and he connects their mouths. He smells and tastes like peppermint, it’s strong on his tongue as Vanitas pulls him closer by his hips, and they’re walking until Vanitas sits on the couch, and Ventus is crawling onto his lap, and their lips meet again, and its warm and intoxicating that he can’t get enough of it.

He’s desperate, he won’t deny that, and drunk and on a drug that continues to make his body feel numb, but he’s aware of Vanitas’ hands placing pressure on Ventus’ waist, and his tongue in his mouth. And he’s moaning and writhing, and it feels really good.

This was crazy eager, a bliss that sings in his body while his heart races against his flesh, and Ventus is tossing his sweater to the floor before curling his fingers into Vanitas’ red shirt that’s soft to the touch.

Vanitas is placing small kisses on Ventus’ jaw, along his chin, then Ventus is tilting his head back, mind swimming as Vanitas scrapes his teeth against his throat, and he sucks and nips, and places pressure there that Ventus can hardly feel, and he’s shamelessly moaning, and he’s…

“Ventus,” Vanitas says against his throat, panting low, wanting as much as Ventus did. “You’re drunk—”

“I know,” Ventus choked out, turning his head to the side, somehow his fingers found their way into Vanitas’ soft dark hair. 

“—And you’re on painkillers.”

Well, that brought him back down.

“What? No, I’m not.” Then he was simply sitting on Vanitas, his legs on either side, hands placed on his shoulders, as he frowned down at Vanitas who smiled at his confusion.

“You didn’t know what you were consuming this entire time?”

Ventus had no idea what he was talking about. “Zexion doesn’t sell painkillers.”

“He sells some, but he bought more from people who had stronger ones,” Vanitas said, leaning up and about to kiss Ventus, but he moved back, trying to recall what he was talking about.

“Don’t they show up in the drinks?”

“Not all of them.” Oh. Well, shit. Zexion could’ve told him what the hell was going on when it started, but maybe he was hoping that he’d get drunk so he’d go home to his bed. Or find himself being taken care of by Vanitas. 

Ventus sunk down and kissed Vanitas, soft, warm, a comfort in his rather chaotic mind as music thumped around them, blocked by the door. It wasn’t as desperate, but Ventus didn’t want to let go, he didn’t want to be apart from him, as if he wanted to merge and connect, and never feel the pain of being separated. 

He whimpered when Vanitas kissed him on his neck again, when he pressed his teeth there on the other side, away from the other throbbing pain, and Vanitas whispered comforting words that Ventus could hardly recall what they were. Maybe some endearing words that were mixed between the intoxicating sea of alcohol and painkillers, and that he was actually kissing Vanitas, and he no longer needed to stare at him from across a room like a useless romantic.

His mouth is warm, lips so soft, the kiss is less sloppy than Ventus had thought, and maybe Vanitas was trying to avoid that.

What ruined the entire moment was a knock at the door, then it opening, and Ventus yelped, and Vanitas had loosened his grip around his waist enough for Ventus to push himself off and crawl onto the seat next to him, pressing his knees to his chest, hiding his face with his hands like a fucking useless child.

Axel stood in the doorway and snorted at Ventus’ reaction while Vanitas got up from the couch. “Xehanort needs your help with...something.” 

Vanitas nods, “Okay, hold on…” And as he turns to face Ventus who is still hiding. “Ventus, hey, it’s okay, you’re fine.” He was bent down, pulling Ventus’ hands away from his face, and as Ventus looks up, flustered by getting caught by Axel of all people, then Vanitas kisses him gently, and while he pulls away and Ventus tries to follow him, he smiles at him. “I’ll be right back, okay, I just have to take care of something.”

Ventus nods, and as he watched Vanitas head for the door, he bites down on his lip, then Roxas steps past Axel as the door closes, and they’re staring at one another like idiots.

Roxas has a wide smile on his face, and Ventus is covering his with his hands again, biting down on his lip to stop his own smile from giving away how fucking happy he is in his rather drunk and drugged state.

“You two…?”

“No!...Yes! Shut the fuck up!”

Roxas laughed as he crosses the room to Ventus and sits where Vanitas had been, but he slides closer, and leans against Ventus’ legs. “Come on, I saw it from the hall, there’s a nice red hickey on your neck.”

“A what?” Ventus says, ignoring his embarrassment, and pressing his fingers to his neck where he can feel the puffy skin there, and recalled Vanitas...doing something that was making him moan like a fucking stupid—

“You two kissed, he gave you _two_ hickies,” Roxas laughed, hugging Ventus. “Finally, fuck, it’s been fucking awkward since you two met.”

“You don’t know when we met.”

“At the park, I’m not stupid, I saw him staring at you like some lovelorn idiot.”

Ventus didn’t bother telling him they saw each other behind Riku’s house, but he didn’t think it counted all that much.

“What about _you_?” Ventus asked, trying to change the conversation. “Have you said anything to Axel? It’s been weeks…”

Roxas rolled his eyes, “I told him how I felt, and we had a great talk about it, less yelling then I thought.”

Ventus is surprised Roxas isn’t as flustered as he is, but then again, he deals with romance a bit differently than Ventus does. “And? You make it sound like you two aren’t on the same page.”

Roxas gives him a pointed look. “Are you serious? Axel’s been pining for me for the longest fucking time, he’s not going to back out when I brought it up. That’d be dumb.”

“Are you two dating then?” Ventus asked.

He sighed, “He wants too, I want too, and whatever progress we wanted hasn’t been going the way I thought it’d be.” He smiled at Ventus’ frown. “What did you do? Or...what did Vanitas do? Who kissed first?”

Ventus is surprised that Roxas is even asking him for this type of advice even though it happened a mere ten minutes ago, the heat of it still on his skin, the taste of him in his mouth. A euphoria that he can’t sift through between the alcohol and painkillers in his system.

“ _I_ kissed him.”

Roxas arched his brows. “That’s surprising.”

Ventus nods, finding it shocking as well. “Holy shit...I kissed him, and I was in his lap, and he gave me two hickies, and it was so fucking good!” He pressed his hands to his warm cheeks.

Roxas leaned against him, then his phone started to vibrate in his pocket. He reached in and pulled it out, reading the message. “Aqua and Terra are outside with Zexion and Demyx.”

“What about Xion?” Ventus asked, getting up from the couch. He glanced at the door, wondering when Vanitas was coming back.

“We’re going with her too.”

“What about Sora and Riku?”

Roxas scoffed as they walked to the door. “They left twenty minutes ago. Sora was trying to start fights with some people at the bar, and Riku grabbed him and hauled him out.”

Ventus nodded, pulling his sweater on as he followed Roxas out of the room. “Vanitas—”

“You can text him, right?” Roxas asked. “You might as well, he should know you’re leaving.”

Ventus was a little disappointed. So he texted Vanitas that he was leaving as Roxas helped him walk down the hall. He didn’t see him anywhere, and he didn’t respond to his text.

Where did he go?

Axel wasn’t outside either, and Xion was standing with Larxene, Zexion, and Demyx by Aqua’s car, Terra’s was behind hers. 

“Is that a hickey?” Aqua asked, about to touch it before Ventus stepped back.

“No, I…”

“It’s fine,” Aqua said, rubbing the top of his hair. “You can ride with me, Roxas, can you help Xion into the back.”

Roxas nodded, taking Xion’s hand and leading her to Aqua’s black car. Zexion and Demyx were hopping into Terra’s, alongside Larxene who was holding a rather large bottle that hadn’t been cracked open, she also flicked her cigarette when Terra told her to get rid of it.

“Where are we going?” Ventus asked.

“Larxene’s,” Aqua said, “Kairi and Namine are already over there, including Riku and Sora. We’re going to keep it quiet. This place is so fucking loud, so no one will bother us while the drunks are passed out in her bedroom.”

Ventus nodded as he pulled the passenger door closed, and stared at the building while they drove away from it. Will he see Vanitas again after this? He still hadn’t gotten his text, and Roxas wasn’t as worried for Axel.

He looked away from the building as they drove further away from it. He swallowed thickly as he pressed his hand gently to the hickey on his neck. If only he wasn’t as drunk, maybe then it could mean something more than desperate intoxication. 


	6. In The Dark

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually wasn't going to write anything...but I decided to anyways, just to get the idea out of my head. And uh, I'm not outlining anything btw, this is all just random ideas popping up. Mostly I just want to write about people getting drunk, with some hooking up, maybe love, and that's about it. So if you're expecting people to start fucking in this fic, then you have another thing coming, cause I'm terrible at that, and I'd rather not. :) (I'm obviously not editing because I don't want too.)
> 
> I hope you enjoy anyways, I mean, I stayed up until 3am to finish this, so....
> 
> Comments and/or Kudo's are appreciated.

The sixth time he came upon Vanitas, and it was later that night after Ventus left Xehanort and Saix’s party. He was buzzed, neck bruised, a blissed smile spread across his lips as he got out of Aqua’s car. 

Larxene’s house was a bit bigger than Axel’s, probably because she shares the house with Marluxia. It didn’t matter, she had expensive taste. Her carpet inside was black, her couches were leather, no rips in sight, her coffee table was glass, and she had a large thin TV that was currently playing music. The kitchen had an island in the center, a rectangular glass table at the side where Roxas, Xion, Kairi, and Namine were sitting. Black marble counters and a steel refrigerator.

Ventus was getting the idea why they didn’t want a big party at her place. It would be rough to clean up once morning comes around.

Larxene strode past him with the large bottle. She set it down on the table. “I want no fights in this house, or you drunk idiots will end up in a cab.” She said this sweetly as Ventus entered the kitchen with Aqua and Terra. He glanced back at Zexion who was climbing the stairs to the second floor with Demyx.

“Where’d you get that?” Kairi asked about the bottle in Larxene’s hand. There were already glasses on the table that were half full of vodka with a few icecubes. Namine was drinking from a tall glass that looked more like wine with fruit sitting at the bottom.

Ventus noticed the box of beer on the floor. It wasn’t cracked open yet, neither were the three other Whiskey bottles and coolers. He was a little sick at looking at them, and they’d probably wouldn’t be drinking all of it...unless that was the plan to begin with.

“Stole it from Xehanort,” Larxene said, a wicked smile pulling on her lips, “fuck him, right?”

Xion grinned, “With his all boy’s club, I fucking agree, we should’ve stole more than just a bottle.”

“It’s actually one of his favorites,” Larxene said, cracking the bottle open. “I went down there, and those _boys_ were fucked up on morphine, codeine, and heroin.” She reached for one of the glasses and poured herself a glass. Ventus watched her knock it back, her eyes glinted mischievously as she set the glass down. “You’re right, Xion, I should’ve taken a lot more, I might even go back and grab another, then I’ll drag Marluxia back.”

Aqua picked up one of the glasses, gesturing at the bottle, and Larxene pushed it to her. “I’ll drive,” she offered.

“On alcohol?” Roxas asked.

Aqua downs the drink and smiles warmly. “I’ll be fine, I haven’t had much.”

Larxene placed the cap back on the bottle and pushed it toward the other bottles sitting in the center of the table. “Don’t drink too much, we’ll be back.” Then she and Aqua headed for the door, leaving Terra who was grabbing one of the beers in the box sitting on the floor. 

“Well, this is about to get interesting,” Roxas said.

“Where are they going?” Zexion asked, staggering into the kitchen.

“Stealing a bottle from Xehanort, and to kidnap Marluxia,” Kairi told him, taking a sip of her drink.

“Oh shit, I should go with them, maybe I can pick up some more of their—”

Ventus twisted around, which was not a great thing since he was dizzy and nauseous, and he slapped a hand over his mouth, and Terra was giving him an odd look as he sprinted after Zexion.

“Hey, what did you give me back at Xehanort’s party?”

“Uh,” Zexion said, carefully walking down the stone steps, “Codeine, but I can get some other stuff!”

Ventus’ mouth fell open while Zexion climbed into the back of Aqua’s car. “I don’t want anymore, what the fuck, Zexion!” Except they were driving away from the curb, already heading down the street.

He closed the door and staggered back to kitchen. He pulled out a chair and sat down, rubbing his eyes while Kairi was laughing with Namine, and Roxas was pouring himself another glass of whatever he was drinking, and Xion was standing at the back with a cigarette between her fingers.

“Where’s Axel?” Ventus asked him.

Roxas glanced up, his eyes hazy, face sweaty, he pushed a bit of his bangs out of his face with his shaky fingers. “He said Xehanort needed his help,” he slurred, the words sounded far away while he looked down at his glass of Whiskey. “I don’t know what kind of help he needed...he wouldn’t tell me. Fucking asshole.”

“Maybe it was none of your business,” Kairi said, nudging him.

Roxas glared, “Where’s Sora and Riku, I thought they’d be...here, with us?

Namine pointed up with a smile curved upon her lips. “They’ve been up there for awhile, and I didn’t have the heart to tell Larxene.”

“Or the spine,” Roxas said, getting up from the table.

“Don’t, Roxas,” said Kairi, “leave them be, if they want to do whatever they’re doing, then let them.”

“I’m going to the bathroom,” Roxas said, walking past Ventus. 

“Sure, he is,” Namine said, rolling her eyes. 

Xion wandered back into the kitchen, she sat beside Namine with a lopsided smile. “Is Zexion still here?” she asked Ventus.

He shook his head, rocking back and forth at the fog in his head. He wasn’t even sure if he was floating up or falling down. It was all confusing to him, and maybe that was the point. If Zexion had given him the drug, wouldn’t he have a stronger reaction to it? He did drugs a lot, but it’s not like he gotten used to it.

“He went with Larxy and Aqua,” Ventus said, unable to look away from the fruit in Namine’s glass. It was so pretty, bubbly, like weird glass.

Kairi snorted, “Larxy.” Her words were honey sweet.

“Fuck…” Ventus groaned.

Xion laughed, the sound going in and out as she pushed herself off her chair and made her way around the table, her hands were soft on Ventus’. “Come outside with me. I have some stuff, it’ll make you feel better.”

He couldn’t follow her words, but he was being led out into the back, they stepped out on Larxene’s deck. It was smooth under his feet and he realized he wasn’t wearing shoes, nor did Xion. She was really pretty in her dress.

“Sit with me,” Xion said, and they sat down on the stairs.

Their backyard was really nice. Cut grass with towering fences, a tree to their far left side. A stone walkway that led to the garages, and a flower bed on the right side. 

“Holy shit, this place is nice.”

“They’re luckier than most,” Xion said, and Ventus noticed she was holding a joint. She flicked the lighter, and lit the end.

“Is that…”

“Here,” Xion said.

He took it, and recalled the many times he had done this with Zexion, Roxas, and Sora. Sweet, unlike the burn of cigarette smoke when it touched his tongue, this was different, and he breathed it out. It seemed to have calmed down a bit of his frustration from what Zexion gave him earlier.

They found themselves lying in the grass, staring up at the sparse stars. It was beautiful. So nice, far away, and he reached out and laughed, and Xion giggled.

“You took some of his...stuff, right?” Ventus asked.

“Some,” she drawled.

“Codeine?”

“Oh, other times, I don’t ask, sometimes it’s better not to ask.”

Wouldn’t it be better to ask what the fuck they were consuming?

“Did Axel?”

“He wasn’t fucked like I am.” She giggled again. “He didn’t give anything to Roxas, and he didn’t really want too anyways. I got offered a bit before I puked in the toilet…”

Offered? “By others?”

“Girls, boys, anyone, I took whatever was offered.” She giggled again.

Ventus wasn’t sure if she was talking about drugs now. Before he could ask, two figures stood over them.

“Are you two fucked up?” Roxas asked, holding a beer.

Sora looked pleased, hair mussed, a mark on his neck that almost looked similar to what is on Ventus’, but it was darker. “Where’d you get the stuff from?” Sora asked, sitting down beside Xion.

“I bought some,” Xion said, taking it out of her pocket.

Roxas was a little eager and sat down before them, and he helped pull Ventus into a sitting position. Then they had another round until Terra called them inside. The others who left to Xehanort’s had come back.

“I need a drink,” Xion said, and Sora helped her up, while Roxas helped Ventus. They were a bit off balanced, but they laughed it off as they headed back inside the house. And to Ventus’ surprise, it was a lot crazier than he had thought it’d be, and he was a bit confused why there were more people in the house when Larxene wanted it quiet.

Zexion was in the kitchen, and he waved at Ventus. It looked like he had gotten what he wanted from the party. He walked around the table as Roxas, Sora, and Xion picked up a bottle from the table and filled their glasses. 

“I got it,” Zexion whispered as Ventus used the wall for leverage. He was still dizzy, the room was spinning way too much to the point his mind was numb.

“W-What?” he asked, trying to remember what he had gotten.

Zexion leaned closer for comfort, and he said into Ventus’ ear, his breath tickling his neck. “Morphine, Codeine, some—”

“Zexion!”

He turned and spotted Marluxia calling his name from the living room. His eyes were glassy, and his smile was wide, as he made his way over to them. Ventus wouldn’t get used to the way he towered over them, and particularly blocked off everyone else. Although, Ventus did spot Larxene and some women he didn’t recognize. Kairi had gone into the living room to change the music, and Namine was still in her chair, watching as stranger after stranger moved throughout the house.

“Give me some of it,” he said softly, leaning close to Zexion who gave a quick nod, then he reached and pulled on Ventus’ sleeve. “Come outside.”

“I already got some from Xion.”

Marluxia grinned at him, “And all this time I thought you were taken by—”

Zexion yanked on Ventus’ sleeve, and he tastes the night air for the third or so time, and he barely trips down the steps if it weren’t for Marluxia steadying him. They’re both laughing like strange creatures as they walk out of Larxene’s yard, and they’re standing in the dark alley.

Ventus rubs his arms while Zexion takes something out from his pocket. “Don’t you snort that?” Ventus asked. “Why are we doing it out here?”

“Not that,” Zexion mutters under his breath, passing Marluxia something else as he pockets it. “I have this.” He’s holding something similar to what Xion had, but it’s something else, and Ventus doesn’t recognize what the hell it is. It’s way too dark, and someone could see them if they drove down the alley.

“Did you see Riku?” he asks, just to..ask.

“Yeah, he’s inside,” Marluxia tells him. He has something between his fingers, and Zexion lights it. Ventus has no idea what it is until its on his mouth, and he’s breathing it in, and he still has no idea what the fuck that is.

“Is that…?”

“Do you really want to know what the fuck this shit is?” Marluxia is asking him, and he’s sounding so far away, but at the same time, he’s so close, and for some reason the street has a strong clean smell to it. 

What the fuck did he consume?

“We should do this downstairs,” Marluxia says to Zexion. “I have one—”

Zexion scoffs, “I do too.”

Fuck sakes. “You got any cigarettes?” Then Marluxia is digging into his pant pocket and he opens a case and gives Ventus one. He feels it, and it’s so strange, then he places it to his lips and takes Zexion’s lighter.

Three or four other people appear from the yard, and they’re asking for some of Zexion’s stuff. They seem kind of pushy, which doesn’t help when Ventus is shoved against the fence, and he’s moving toward the gate so he can go back inside the house. He doesn’t hear shouting, but it still somewhat bothers him.

He climbs the stairs, smokes the cigarette and watches the fence, but he doesn’t see anyone else come back until two girls asks about them. He points, and they scurry along the path before disappearing into the alley.

Ventus flicks the cigarette, and he walks back into the house, swaying as he tries to keep himself steady. The warm light assaults his eyes as he finds a glass, and Namine...is gone. Kairi is also.

Sora and Roxas are sitting at the table, and to Ventus’ surprise, Axel’s sitting beside them. He looks up with a smile on his lips, holding a glass of Whiskey.

“Where were you?” Roxas asked, almost shouting over the noise in the living room.

“You look a little fucked up,” Axel tells him.

More than he felt in awhile, and he almost falls off the chair that he tries to sit down on. He nods at them, reaching for a bottle, and he can’t help it, he’s desperate for alcohol.

“Seriously,” Roxas said to him, grabbing his chair and pulling it to Ventus’ left side, “what the fuck is wrong with you? You look messed up.”

“I’m not,” Ventus manages to say, and he’s almost laughing, but he stops himself by downing his drink. How the fuck is everything so numb? Why is the room twisting in on itself? What is going on?

“What did Zexion give you?”

Ventus fills his glass and smiles at Roxas. He didn’t want to tell him anything, he didn’t really want to do anything but drink. So he does while Axel coaxes Roxas to sit beside him again. Did they finally talk, or were they still trying to avoid each other in the most subtlest way?

Larxene storms into the kitchen, shoving some girl to the side who stood in her way and earns herself a glare, but Larxene hardly gives a shit. It is her house, and anyone who knows Larxene should know not to get in her way. 

“Axel." She slams her hands down on the table, upsetting the bottles as they clink together, and Sora’s frowning down at his glass before picking it up. “Kairi’s fighting some stupid bitch in the front, and she’s fucking blacked out drunk.”

“You can handle it,” Axel grins, “I believe in you, Larxy.”

“Axel, you know if I go out there, I’m going to punch those stupid fuckers in the faces until they’re knocked out, so how about you don’t be a little shit, and grab Kairi,” Larxene said, both sweet and annoyed.

Axel sighed, “Why me? You know if I get in a fight, the cops will show up.”

Larxene rolled her eyes. “So, it’ll be Riku’s all over again.”

Right on time, Riku walked into the kitchen, shaking his head at Sora who arched a brow at him. “Namine jumped in, and let me tell you, she’s not going to enjoy grass stains and blood on her dress in the morning.”

“They might even tear clumps of her blonde hair from her pretty head,” Larxene said, crossing her arms and giving a pointed look at Axel.

“Fine, for fuck sakes, you should try to find Marly—”

“He’s in the alley with Zexion,” Ventus interjected, raising his glass before lowering it and taking a slow sip. Yeah, he can’t taste any of the alcohol.

Axel stood, smiling at Larxene. “Grab those idiots before these random strangers steal their drugs and money. I’d rather not have Zexion lose his shit in the morning.”

“I’m sure it’ll be a wake up call,” Roxas says, looking up at Axel.

Ventus is both surprised and relieved when Axel took Roxas’s face and kissed him right on the mouth, then he’s walking around the table and following Riku into the crowd so they can make sure Namine and Kairi aren’t fucked with. Larxene was already walking to the back, shoving a guy to the side as she stepped outside.

Ventus stood unsteadily, and reached for the bottle Larxene had brought back from Xehanort’s, he also noticed several newer bottles, uncracked. He guessed she was successful at stealing more of Xehanort’s alcohol.

“He kissed you,” Ventus smiled at Roxas as he refills his glass. Holy shit. He can’t stand right, he’s almost falling forwards, but catches himself. 

Xion had also returned from wherever the fuck she had gone off too, and reached for the bottle that spilled slightly on the table, and kept it standing up in the center, alongside an ashtray, and half full beer bottles.

Roxas is flushed, but Ventus isn’t sure if he’s always looked like that since alcohol entered his system. He is smiling, as if the kiss itself was a gift meant for him, and he’s appreciating it while sipping his Vodka.

“What about you?” Roxas asked, and Ventus tilts his head slightly confused, “you haven’t even noticed he was here, and I don’t know if you do it on purpose, but he’s literally always staring at you while you stagger around with whatever Zexion gave you.”

_What the fuck?_

Ventus looks toward the crowd, and as people move around, he spots him by the hall, standing in the shadows with his back against the wall. He _is_ staring at him, and Ventus’ face warms at this realization.

“When did he get here?” Ventus asked, bringing the drink to his lips.

Roxas chuckled, standing up and as Ventus tries to drink the entire glass, Roxas is taking it away from him. “After you walked out with both Zexion and Marluxia. I didn’t think you were coming back.”

“Why wouldn’t I be?” Ventus frowns, almost tilting forwards if it weren’t for Roxas grabbing his shoulders. 

“I don’t know, I just thought you guys were leaving, but here you are, and for fuck sakes, Ven, just go talk to him.” Then he leans close, and says, “He’s been asking for you.”

“He has?” Ventus smiles in a silly, drunk way.

Roxas nods, helping him around the table, “Hurry up, go talk to him, and if something happens...well, make sure it’s not Larxene’s room, you know how she is when people end up on her bed...or floor.”

Ventus has no idea what Roxas is talking about until he’s halfway toward Vanitas when the realization pops inside his head. He slows, panic sings in his body. No, that wouldn’t happen, right? He didn’t want to, not like this...shit...he never thought about this.

Before he could think about it, or even look at Vanitas, his wrist is grabbed by Zexion who’s rushing by with a laugh escaping his lips.

“What the fuck?” Ventus calls, and then he noticed he ran right past Vanitas, and he’s going toward the front door. They squeeze through a group who are in the way, and find Axel and Riku walking back toward the house.

“What the fuck?” Zexion called, eyes shining, “Larxene said Kairi and Namine are—”

Riku is a little unsettled as he walks by them, and Axel is pushing back his long hair. Zexion is still gripping Ventus’ wrist, and he drags him after them, but then he’s yanked the other way. He gasps, almost running into someone, and he can’t hear Zexion over the music coming from the TV.

He’s almost falling as he runs up the stairs, and it’s only when he gets to the top that he realizes who it is.

“Vanitas.”

He’s pulled down the hall, and it’s dark toward both Larxene and Marluxia’s rooms, but they don’t get close until Ventus is pressed against the wall.

“Finally,” Vanitas breathed, and he leans against Ventus, and their mouths connect. 

Ventus’ eyes flutter closed at the feeling of them pressed together, to the warmth of the kiss even if Ventus can hardly feel it. His mouth is numb, and has been for several hours. He tries to pull Vanitas closer, even if there is no more space between them. 

“W-Where were you?” Ventus asked when Vanitas pulled back, tipping Ventus’ head up so he can kiss his neck, to bite it like he did before.

“I thought you went home,” Vanitas answered, panting, his hands gripping both of Ventus’ wrists, keeping him pinned to the wall. “I looked for you, but Roxas said you walked out with Zexion and Marluxia.” Then his fingers tightened, and Ventus frowned.

“I didn’t leave, I’m right here.”

Vanitas sighed, raising his head to look Ventus in the eyes. “You’re not only drunk, but you’re also high...what did he give you this time, more Codeine, Meth, Oxycontin?”

Ventus had to think about it, and said, “I think Coke.”

Vanitas rolled his eyes, and pressed a light kiss on Ventus’ mouth. “You’re a mess.”

“Well,” Ventus said, trying to lean in to get another kiss, “Xion gave me weed, and I was already on drugs before I got here, so who cares.”

Vanitas glared, “I care.”

“You’re the one who walked out and left me. Again!”

“I had to deal with—”

“Who the fuck cares what Xehanort wants!”

“I did,” Vanitas said, sounding frustrated, “at the time when it mattered.”

Ventus groaned, closing his eyes at the nauseous feeling coming over him in ugly waves. “I think I need…”

Then Vanitas is dragging him back down the hall toward the bathroom. They stepped inside, flicking the light on while Ventus flipped the toilet seat up, and stood there, staring at it while waiting for it all to come up.

“I owed Xehanort from a time when I used to deal, so did Axel, we’re just trying to help out a friend.”

Ventus nodded, gripping the sink, “Yeah, I get it.” He didn’t, but he was mostly focused on not throwing up because he didn’t want to gross Vanitas out. “Can you leave?”

“No.”

“Why?”

Vanitas said nothing while staring at him.

This was really not ideal for him. The one moment he realized Vanitas had come back, and he wasn’t staying with Xehanort. It had to be the moment he was ready to throw up into the toilet. He waited for a minute or so before washing his face with water.

“I like seeing it,” Vanitas says when Ventus dries his face. 

“What?” Ventus asked, placing the towel back on the hook and meeting Vanitas’ intense golden eyes, how beautiful and frightening they looked, as if he could see everything in Ventus’ mind, as if he knew how he felt for him.

Vanitas took Ventus’ hand gently, and pulled him close, and said, “The marks I left on you.” He wrapped his arms around Ventus’ waist, pulling him close and softly kissing him. It wasn’t as crazy back at Xehanort’s party when Ventus had initiated it, when he was angry and full of want and need, this was slow and even, as if Vanitas was trying to test something out while Ventus’ mind was spinning with the reminder of what was puckered on either side of his neck. 

He was keeping him firmly against his chest as Ventus squirmed, fingers knotted in the fabric of Vanitas’ sweater. He was trying desperately to take it off, but it was difficult when Vanitas was in full control of what was going on between them.

“Across the room while you were with Axel, Roxas, and Sora,” Vanitas said between kissing Ventus and catching his breath, “I saw it, I thought about it, holding you in my lap while you lose yourself like you are now.”

Ventus whimpers, turning his head and Vanitas deepened the kiss as he maneuvered them against the wall. 

“Ah, so good,” Ventus moans, needy little noises as he keeps his eyes closed, breathing heavily. 

It’s so nice, well...until someone started knocking on the door and calling his name.

“Ven! Ven!”

Vanitas cursed, hesitantly letting go of Ventus so he could unlock and open the door. And it wasn’t surprising that it turned out to be Zexion, and behind him was Xion. Their pupils were blown out, and they looked almost panicked.

“What?” Ventus asked, frowning at them while stepping closer to Vanitas. The world seemed to tilt as he came back to earth. 

“They’re looking for Kairi and Namine, they ran off,” Xion said quickly. 

“What the fuck do you mean?” Ventus asked, about to step out of the bathroom, until Vanitas grabbed him while Zexion and Xion stepped back. 

“You should stay here,” Vanitas said. “I’ll check out what they’re talking about.”

“No, you’re always leaving me!” Wow, okay, so he did sound like a child.

“We can sit in Marluxia’s room, I left Demyx in there,” Zexion said, glancing between them.

“I’d rather not leave him with you,” Vanitas said, warily.

“I won’t get him anymore high than he already is,” Zexion told him in an almost serious tone if it weren’t for his slurring and wide pupils.

“I’ll go with them,” Xion said.

“That doesn’t make it any better.”

Ventus sighed, “I’m either sitting with them, or going with you, make up your mind.”

Vanitas rolled his eyes and pulled him out of the bathroom. They walked down the hall to Marluxia’s room. Xion flicked the light on, and it was a black light, but it did show them where Demyx was on the other side of the queen sized bed beneath the blankets.

Ventus turned and before he could say anything, Vanitas kissed him, “I’ll be right back, promise.” Then he watched him walk down the hall, and Ventus scowled at both Zexion and Xion.

“If I pass out and never see Vanitas again until the next time we party and I bump into him by accident in three to four months, I’m going to kill the both of you.” He closed the door and walked over to them. They were sitting on the floor, backs pressed against the bed.

“Don’t worry, I don’t think Vani wants to let you go any time soon,” Xion said, taking out a pipe.

“Yeah, I’m not getting high…”

Zexion scoffed, pushing Xion’s hand away from him. “We shouldn’t be doing that in Marly’s room anyways, he’s as much of an asshole as Larxene. It’s bad enough I left Demyx in here.”

“Are you two dating?” Ventus asked, leaning against Zexion. 

“I thought everyone knew that.”

“I don’t know what’s official, and what’s not.”

“Well, Roxas and Axel are a thing, so is Sora and Riku,” Xion said. “I’m still single, if it makes you guys feel better, but I think I’m the only one since Vani staked his claim on you.” She reached over and softly laughed while pressing her fingers against his neck where the hickey was.

Ventus groaned, pushing her fingers away from him. “Can you please stop calling him that.”

Xion was playing music for about fifteen minutes until they heard noise coming from outside. The three of them struggled to get up and staggered toward the window, they peeked through the blinds and caught sight of a group in the back. 

“Is that Larxene?” Zexion whispered.

She punched a girl square in the face and was storming her way across the yard to the fence.

“And there’s Marluxia,” Xion pointed out.

He was helping the girl up, and possibly threatening her or telling her to leave. It sometimes confuses Ventus of either one.

“I see Roxas,” Ventus said. He was watching Marluxia escort the girl into the house before sprinting off after Larxene. “What the fuck is going on outside?”

“I’ll check it out,” Xion said, and she was already leaving the room while Ventus and Zexion stared out the window. 

Ventus does spot Vanitas walking across the yard toward the fence, then he disappeared into the alley. There’s the flickering of his and Larxene’s phones before they’re both walking farther away from the house. Xion is running after them and barely runs into Roxas who also disappears into the alley. 

“I have no idea what is happening,” Ventus mutters, eyes burning. “I’m so tired.” He was also lonely, but he felt that all the time. He crawled onto the bed, away from Demyx who is softly snoring into the pillow, and he covers himself with Marluxia’s soft blanket.

“Are we seriously passing out now?” Zexion asked while flicking the light off and draping the three of them in darkness.

“I mean…” Ventus murmurs, lying down, and groaning when Zexion crawls over him so he could lie next to Demyx.

Zexion sighs and Ventus closes his eyes, but they aren’t falling asleep.

“When did you start to like him?” Ventus asked, wanting to know so he could understand his own confusing and _desperate_ feelings.

Zexion lets out a short laugh, “Sometimes I think I’ve always _liked_ him. Maybe it’s a bit more, almost like a good six-seven year relationship, married material, wanting a house together, children…”

Ventus opens his eyes to the dark ceiling before turning to face Zexion, but he’s staring at the ceiling. “You thought about all of that?”

“It’s just thoughts, sometimes during the night when I’m alone, when I think about him, when I want him to be with me, I think about these things,” Zexion says, laughing again, but it’s quiet. “I can see a life with him.”

Ventus hadn’t gotten that close. Since meeting Vanitas, he wanted to know him, to understand him, and when he was so angry with himself for being petulant, and almost desperate with his feelings, it all came crashing down to just them, as if they always knew one another completely, skipping all those other steps.

“What about you?” Zexion asked, facing Ventus. “Do you like him...or is he just a drunken night, a fling, a fuck buddy?”

Ventus furrows his brows, smiling. “Uh, no, I haven’t thought about sex...not yet, I just want to be with him...that’s all.”

“That’s all? What if he wants more?”

“Then he’ll have to fucking deal with it.” Ventus laughs, bringing the blanket closer, his fingers gently touching the mark on his neck. Oh, how he wanted to be with him.

Zexion laughs with him, then they’re quiet, and it’s hard to keep his eyes opened until sleep slowly embraces him. 

What does wake him up is soft coaxing of his name, and he’s not sure what it is until he turns his head and finds two golden irises staring at him in the gloom. He’s not as startled as he thought, and it’s possibly because of the alcohol and drugs still swimming around in his system.

“Vanitas…is that you or am I dreaming?” Ventus asked, turning his body. 

“It’s me, move over.” Ventus moves back, and feels Zexion behind him, his body curled against Demyx, and they’re both quietly sleeping. He eases himself closer when Vanitas finally gets under the blankets.

“Where did you go?” he whispered, hands roaming upon Vanitas’ arms, his shoulders, and down to his chest. _He is not dreaming, that’s good._

“I had to find Kairi and Namine after they took off,” Vanitas said. “Axel and Riku were having a hard time looking for them, so some of us had to help after Larxene started kicking people out. It was bad enough some of the guys were blacking out.”

Ventus hums, moving closer so he could press himself against Vanitas. He really wanted him to stay and not wander off again. He feels his hands wrap around him, his breath on his forehead.

“Did you find them?” he asked in the crook of Vanitas’ neck. 

“Yeah,” he says, breathy. “They’re sleeping in Larxene’s room. The rest of them are...are…”

Ventus is kissing Vanitas’ neck absentmindedly. He was so tired, but he wanted Vanitas to stay with him. 

“Ven,” he whispered.

“Stay with me,” Ventus murmured against his kiss strewn neck, then to get Vanitas back for earlier, he captures the skin there, then licks to soothe, and he sucks, teeth scraping along the skin, anything to hear Vanitas groan, fingers tightening on Ventus, pulling him closer while placing a leg between his own and pulling them apart.

_Oh, fuck...fuck…_

He bites down, and drags an involuntary moan of his own name from Vanitas’ throat. 

Ventus lets go, licking his own lips and smiles up at him. “Stay with me,” he repeats.

Vanitas is moving up a bit, getting rid of his black sweater and letting it fall to the floor, and then he’s barely covering Ventus before lowering himself, lips catching Ventus’, and it’s greedy and consuming.

“I don’t want to be with anyone else,” Vanitas whispers against his lips, barely touching. The intimacy is there, and unfortunately for them, Ventus can hardly think straight besides wanting to kiss Vanitas and not have him disappear, and he tells him this, the truth slipping from his mouth, all desperation and annoyance.

“I’m not going anywhere,” he says, kissing Ventus again, deeper, punctuating the words and forcing a gasp from Ventus’ lips when he moves down, pulling the collar of his shirt, exposing his collarbone where Vanitas kisses, bites, sucks, and it’s enough that Ventus is letting out shameless little moans of his name.

Well, until…

“I know this is such an amazing discovery, but can you two calm the fuck down,” Demyx says in the dark. 

Ventus snorts, and he starts laughing while Vanitas is laughing against him, and they’re holding one another, and softly kissing until Vanitas is rubbing his back again, and Ventus is closing his eyes against his chest.

“Don’t go anywhere, please…”

“I won’t,” Vanitas whispers, pressing a kiss to his forehead, “I’ll be here when you wake up.”

It’s a small comfort, at least for the alcohol and drugs in his system, but he’s pretty fucking sure that kissing Vanitas and holding him is everything he ever wanted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm obviously writing narcotics wrong, but if Ventus is passed out most of the time, then it's not fun, and I have nothing planned so...my bad. LOL. Maybe I'll add another drug that I'm familiar with since they're much easier to write since I experienced them at one point in my short life. LOL. I also apologize for the random tense changes that are all over the place....I'm literally not editing and just writing for almost 8-9 hours. (I do look at my phone, and change songs, and wonder what to write...LOL. it does take time to figure out what is happening. And romance makes me feel weird, so I have to think and do research...)
> 
> I hoped you enjoyed.
> 
> Comments and/or Kudo's are appreciated.


	7. Inevitable

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was not meant to be edited, or whatever, so I don't need anyone's constructive criticism. :D I'm only writing this because I've been having issues writing my stories, and I decided to write in free form. So nothing has been planned, or whatever. I didn't outline. I just wrote in a disorganized way while trying to think of the time when I got drunk and did drugs as a teen. And my sister is a pill popper, and she's addicted to drugs, while I have a friend who has done mostly everything. :/ Lmfao. I did not write narcotics correctly in this fic, it was just randomly added. So, don't mind that, I guess.
> 
> Most people won't like this story because of the alcohol and drugs, and possibly the lack of sex, because people like smut or whatever. However, I don't do that, so I just tried to write about two people who liked each other, but they were having difficulties with their feelings. Haha.
> 
> Comments and/or Kudo's are appreciated.

The seventh time he had come upon Vanitas was...sometime in the afternoon, and he had blinked his eyes open and was staring at him. He was quietly sleeping, his hand placed over Ventus’ side, and looking so calm and beautiful and….

_Fuck._

“Fuck!” Ventus grabbed Vanitas’ hand and dragged it off of him, “Vanitas!” And he was shoving the blankets off of them, and noticed that Demyx and Zexion weren’t lying beside them, and they were replaced by Marluxia. He didn’t question it as he climbed over Vanitas who was finally waking up.

“Ventus?” he groaned, hands reaching for him.

He could hardly speak, the ground was barely steady as he raced out of the room, almost falling and hitting the floor, hands gliding along it as he headed for the bathroom. Then to his relief, no one was inside it, and he slammed it shut, the second he flipped the toilet open, everything had come out in a disgusting splash.

Ventus gripped the sides of the toilet while his body jerked, and he gasped once he was sure everything was gone from his stomach. He had his eyes closed, body trembling, mind reeling. It had almost brought him to his knees at how weak and sick he felt. 

_Oh fuck…_

It was so foul. Burning his throat, the taste was hardly there besides what was in his throat. He wiped away what was on his mouth as he moved to the sink, turning the faucet to wash his mouth out, and anything that was sticking to his lips. He fumbled for the toothpaste inside the cabinet and ate some just to get rid of the lingering taste before drinking the water coming out of the faucet.

A knock sounded on the door as Ventus flushed the toilet, and cleaned whatever had splashed out. He dropped the lid and slowly breathed, trying to get his shit together.

“Ventus…are you okay?”

He laughed softly to himself. Not really. This is so fucking bad. He can still feel whatever he had consumed during the night. It was like someone dug into his skin and bone, scooping up everything within, then scraping the sides. It was so bad.

“Not really,” he finally answered.

The doorknob turned and Vanitas opened the door, looking mildly concerned as Ventus washed his face again.

“You did drink a lot…”

Ventus nodded slowly as he turned the faucet, “I know...fuck, it’s so bad.” He squeezed his eyes shut. The headache pounded on the sides of his head, and he was getting the feeling he wanted to throw up again, but he’d only dry heave since everything had come out already.

Vanitas had taken the towel off the hook and turned Ventus toward him. He carefully dried off the water then leaned forward, and Ventus stared at him, frowning and sick, but curious as Vanitas smelled him.

“Did you eat...toothpaste?”

“Better than tasting what came up,” Ventus said, taking the towel from him and placing it back on the hook.

Ventus could hardly think straight, and as Vanitas pulled him out of the bathroom and toward the staircase, he knew he didn’t really have to think if he just held Vanitas’ hand, and followed him down to the main floor where he glanced around at the living room. He was surprised it was clean, and that Xion was covered with a blanket on one of the couches. 

The kitchen still had all the bottles from last night. Some had caps on and were placed in the sink, including a few glasses and cups. It was also where they came upon Axel, Roxas, Zexion, and Demyx.

“How was your sleep?” Roxas asked, eyes drooping, holding a glass of...orange juice?

“Not good,” Ventus muttered, and sat down on a chair Vanitas had pulled out for him. He covered his face with his hands as Vanitas sat down beside him. “Fuck. I feel so fucking sick.”

Zexion scoffed, “No shit, you drank so much, I’m surprised you didn’t black out.”

“I only do that with Whiskey,” Ventus said, leaning against Vanitas and closing his eyes. “Everything else is fine, and I didn’t touch her tequila…” At least he didn’t think he did.

“Where is Larxene?” Vanitas asked, sounding a lot sober than the rest of them, and Ventus was getting the feeling he hadn’t drank at all, and probably didn’t even touch any drugs either. He kind of wanted to ask about his self-control, but he was so tired that he could hardly open his mouth.

“Upstairs,” Axel answered, nursing his own glass. “She’s sleeping with Namine and Kairi after we found them several blocks from the house, passed out in a park. Fucking idiots. I guess she wasn’t really pissed about them sleeping in her bed.”

“She was probably already fucked up not to care,” Demyx said. 

“I’m surprise you guys stayed,” Vanitas said.

“I’m heading home soon,” Roxas said, yawning. He looked as messed up as Ventus did, and could barely open his eyes. 

“Where’s...Aqua and Terra?” Ventus managed to ask. He wanted to go home, this was so fucking bad, he wanted to go home to his own bed where he can deal with this hangover by himself.

“They left about two hours ago,” Axel said, almost cringing at Ventus’ low groan.

Vanitas rubbed his back, “I can drive you home.” 

Ventus nodded, “Can we go now? I want to sleep, fucking do anything than sit here and be sick.” 

“I just have to get my sweater upstairs, and we can leave.” He kissed Ventus on the side of the head, then he got up from his chair and headed out of the kitchen.

Ventus groaned and leaned against the table. He was still so dizzy, but it wasn’t as fun like during the night when he thrived in it. It was like he fell straight to the ground and he could hardly pick his own body up. As if he were trying to fit into his own skin that was incredibly uncomfortable from the person who was knocking back drink after drink after drink, then taking whatever drug that was given to him.

“Never give me what you gave me last night,” Ventus murmured, glaring at Zexion.

“That was my bad,” Zexion said, looking away from Ventus. “I was so fucked up, I just loved the feeling of being high, and numb, and just...messed up.” He shrugged. “I just got used to destroying myself that it didn’t matter if I dragged everyone else down as well.”

“Well, I don’t like it,” Ventus muttered.

“No one does,” Roxas said, sounding weak. “At least not until the next day when they have to deal with the aftereffects of all the alcohol and drugs in their system…”

Vanitas appeared from the hall with his sweater on, and his keys in his hand. He helped Ventus up, and they said their goodbyes to their friends before walking out of the house. At least they were trying too, Ventus was slow, his legs hurt from them tensing during the night.

Vanitas held his hand, keeping his eyes on Ventus and smiling. “You were all flushed last night, glassy eyed, smiling...now you’re just—”

“Please, shut up,” Ventus muttered, frowning as they walked toward his car that was sitting on the other side of the street.

Vanitas touched his hair, fingers gliding against Ventus’ face. “I hardly met sober Ventus.”

Ventus glared, “This isn’t _sober Ventus_ , this is hungover Ventus.”

“Maybe I’ll meet him more often.”

“If you don’t unlock your car, you might not get the chance too.” 

Vanitas chuckled and unlocked the car, then Ventus opened the passenger door and sat down. He closed it, and leaned himself against the window, somewhat fumbling with the seatbelt as he wrapped it around him, and Vanitas helped him with clicking it together.

“Do you mind if you come back to my place?” he asked as he started up the car.

“Yeah, I do mind,” Ventus said, trembling beneath his sweater, “I’m sick, I want to go home.”

“You will, but I’d like to take care of you.” They were driving away from Larxene’s house, and the motion didn’t help in the least.

“No, for fuck sakes, Vanitas, I want to go home.” 

“You will,” Vanitas answered.

He wanted to get mad, but it was difficult when he had to concentrate on his headache, the pain in his body, and the dizziness. He swore under his breath, while he hugged himself against the door.

Ventus tried to recall what had happened during the night. He remembered leaving Xehanort’s, but even that was hazy. He walked along the maroon colored carpet, the halls full of smoke, and there was a bright light inside the bathroom that was shining down upon Xion’s drunken smile. Then after that, he was in the alley with Zexion and Marluxia, but he had a cigarette in his fingers before finding himself staring into Vanitas’ eyes.

_Why did you leave?_

“Why did you leave?”

“What?” Vanitas asked.

Ventus groaned. He had done something before he hopped into Aqua’s car. Vanitas was so close to him, his words slurring in his head before they found themselves inside a room. And Ventus was angry for something stupid, small even, but it still hurt him, and the words had fallen from his mouth until Vanitas had kissed his knuckles, and it was enough for Ventus to kiss him.

“I kissed you…”

“You remember that?” he asked.

He was hardly paying attention to what Vanitas was saying as he tried to recall what happened. They were kissing, then Ventus touched his neck where the marks were, slightly raised upon the skin. After that, he was in Larxene’s house, then Vanitas had found him again.

“We hardly know each other…” 

“Hasn’t stopped some people,” Vanitas said.

Ventus groaned, narrowing his eyes at him. “How about we get to know each other before I decide this is ever a good idea.”

“I’m pretty sure it is a good idea.”

Of course. He situated himself on the seat. “I’m an only child.”

Vanitas chuckled, “I am too.”

“Aqua and Terra are my best friends.” _Well, Zexion, Sora, and Roxas are too._

“I don’t really have best friends, the ones I hang around with aren’t the type…” Marluxia, Saix, and Xehanort. Right, they didn’t seem like the type. “Do you have your license, or do you just let other people drive you around?” Vanitas asked.

“I have it,” Ventus yawned. “When I first saw you behind Riku’s house, I was the one who drove my friends home. I just don’t have my own car.”

“You knew that was me?”

“When you mentioned it, I had to think about it for a second.” Ventus closed his eyes. Maybe it wasn’t a good idea to talk so much. Then he told Vanitas to pull over, and he pushed the door open while clicking the seat belt off. He stood a few feet away from Vanitas’ car, turned away from him as he waited for anything to come back up.

Shit. This was bad. He recalled how he felt, the desperation, the need in his own body, his heart racing so hard that he didn’t really think it was his. Even now, his denial of his own feelings felt wrong. 

“Are you okay?” Vanitas asked, coming up beside him.

Ventus shook his head, then he was leaning against Vanitas who had wrapped his arms around him. He breathed in the peppermint that clung to Vanitas’ sweater. He even asked about it.

“It’s just gum,” Vanitas said quietly against Ventus’ head while he slowly rubbed his back.

“You always smell like it,” Ventus murmured against his neck. He really did feel nice, and he didn’t really want to move away from him.

However, standing in the road wasn’t ideal, and they walked back to the car where Ventus slumped against the door again. The drive was relatively quiet besides the radio softly playing.

When they arrived to Vanitas’ house, Ventus wasn’t expecting to find a much larger apartment than his own. Of course, there was a lot more space, and less things inside it. There were a few boxes on the sides, a lone bed with white blankets inside the bedroom. A clothes rack sitting on the side with Vanitas’ black and red clothes. Even his kitchen was clean. It just looked nice, but lonely.

“I didn’t expect…” Ventus said, taking off his shoes as he glanced around. “Are you rich?”

Vanitas had a hint of a smile on his face as he flicked on a light in the kitchen. "Not exactly...it's not mine." Ventus had no idea what that meant while he idled in the hall, rocking back and forth, and trying his hardest not to get too dizzy in case he fell.

“Here,” Vanitas said, passing Ventus a glass of water. 

Ventus looked at it, and carefully took it from his hand. “I’m still a little…”

“Yeah,” Vanitas also passed him extra strength Tylenol, “I think this will help the headaches.”

Ventus nodded, taking the pills and quickly consumed them with the water. There was something relieving about drinking the cold water while his entire body stayed hot and uncomfortable underneath his clothes.

“Am I going to just stand here...or can I sleep on your couch?” he asked, passing the cup back to him and looking toward the living room. There was a black couch sitting by the large window that overlooked the city. A TV also sat before it with a black coffee table with a glass top. 

“You can sleep in my room,” Vanitas said, then he led Ventus toward the bedroom. He didn’t turn the light on, and helped Ventus out of his sweater, and pulled off his socks. He was quiet as he pulled the blankets out, and smiled in a reassuring way when Ventus stalled.

“I don’t know if I should be here,” Ventus said, blinking slowly. The pills won’t kick in for another few minutes, and he wasn’t sure when the nausea would fade. 

“It’s okay.” Then to Ventus’ surprise, Vanitas had also pulled out some shorts and a t-shirt. “I think it’ll be better if you changed out of the clothes that you’re in.”

Ventus stared at the article of clothes in Vanitas’ hand. “I have no idea why you’re helping me.”

“Because I want to take care of you.” He sounded sincere as he stepped closer, and gave Ventus a reassuring smile. Carefully, he started to take Ventus’ shirt off, and helped him in the clean one. Ventus had shrugged off the pants, ignoring Vanitas standing in front of him while he pulled on the shorts.

“This is really weird.”

“You’re hung over.”

“So.”

Vanitas smiled, then he told Ventus to get into the bed. He covered the blankets over Ventus, then placed a hand on his forehead. “Do you still feel like throwing up?”

“Kind of…” Ventus squeezed his eyes closed and let out a groan.

“I’ll get a bucket in case you can’t make it to the bathroom.” Then he was walking away, and Ventus watched him before he curled into the blankets, covering his face to hide from the light. There was the conflicting emotions that he was in Vanitas’ apartment, and that he didn’t bother fighting him. He was too sick.

For the next few hours, Ventus had fallen asleep, and when he did wake up, he spent time in the bathroom, the door closed, trying to rid the nausea from his mind as he stood over the toilet. He threw up two or three times, his head ringing, tightening, from the onslaught of what was purging from his small thin body, trembling as he curled his toes, and his fingers, before he was left gasping and crying. 

He washed up, scrubbing his skin with soap and water until they were red at the same time, eating toothpaste and using Vanitas’ mouth wash a few times. He wanted the taste out of his mouth, not a single reminder that it had sat inside of his throat, between his teeth, and on his lips.

The drugs did not help. Vanitas reminded him that he had apparently taken Cocaine. He could hardly remember taking it. And then Codeine in the glass, possibly something else as well. It had shuddered his body, making him clench his teeth, and feel way too awake until falling had truly broken him into what he was now. 

Unbearably sober.

When he finished, he ended up back in Vanitas’ bed. Vanitas had flicked off the lights, and covered the windows when Ventus started to complain about the light. He also gave him Tylenol whenever the other ones wore off. 

“I’m so cold,” Ventus shivered.

Vanitas had gotten in the bed, and Ventus turned toward him, not even bothering to protest as he curled against Vanitas, wrapping his arms around him for warmth, desperate for it, at the same time, intertwining their legs. He needed the weight of someone else to keep him steady while he shivered.

“I was wondering…” Vanitas whispered after they've gotten comfortable.

Ventus hummed, sleep slowly dragging him under.

“When did you know you liked me? Was it just the alcohol and the drugs, or...was it something else?” 

“I don’t know,” Ventus said, partially honest, “I thought maybe it was when we met in the park, but every other time, I wanted to be close…”

“To me?”

“It sounds kind of sappy, but I think I always liked you, I just needed time to think about it.”

Vanitas snorted, then he started lightly rubbing Ventus’ back. “Whenever I met you, you were always drunk or on something. I thought you were a handful when you started running off. Your friends were strange. Roxas was always swearing, Zexion and Sora were sketchy towards Riku and Demyx.”

“Sketchy?” Ventus sighed.

“Something like that...and you, you were just so strange amongst them. I didn’t expect it.”

Expect what, Ventus wanted to ask. He was so tired that his eyes were growing heavier, and then he slipped back into a dream. All of it hazy and faraway. He dreamed of the night when he was walking towards Vanitas. His ash black hair and golden eyes were somehow haunting to him. Almost like he was going to attack him while his lips pulled into a devious smirk.

_“Why don’t you go back to where you belong?” he asked, glaring at the strange being before him, his own heart beating in the same rhythm of this dark creature, as if they were tethered to one another._

_Vanitas laughed in a mocking way before saying, “Make me!”_

Ventus opened his eyes, and almost jerked away from Vanitas who was lying beside him, asleep under the blankets with him. There was already morning light leaking in from the living room.

“Oh shit,” Ventus murmured, thankful that it was only a dream.

He slipped out of the bed and walked into the bathroom. He washed his face, and closed his eyes for a few minutes. Once he was finished, he walked out again. He didn’t feel as sick anymore, but to make sure that nothing randomly surges through him, he took another tylenol and downed it with a glass of cold water.

After he set the glass down, Ventus glanced around the living room, and walked toward the wide window. He slowly pushed the curtain, letting in more light as he looked outside. 

“How do you live like this?” Ventus asked. Not because of the nice apartment, but the loneliness of it, the emptiness. As if there weren’t much soul in it. He didn’t want to start comparing his own lonely apartment to Vanitas’, but it also made him think about how Vanitas rarely consumed alcohol, or took anyone’s drugs.

Whenever he met him, besides the first time, he had stayed sober.

Ventus walked back to the bedroom and laid down beside Vanitas who murmured something under his breath.

“What?” Ventus asked, wrapping his arms around Vanitas, pulling his body close until they were fit together again.

“Where did you go?”

“Nowhere.” Ventus stared at Vanitas’ dark eyelashes. “I took another Tylenol.”

“Do you still feel sick?”

“Somewhat.”

Vanitas leaned close and nuzzled Ventus until he was smiling, then Ventus tenderly kissed him on the mouth. It wasn’t like all the other times when they kissed. When it was spurred on because of alcohol burning in Ventus’ veins, making him swim and drown under the chaotic emotions he had no idea how to control. This was more easier, softer, and hardly falling between his fingers.

Vanitas’ hands moved up, lightly touching the sides of Ventus’ face, only to deepen the kiss while at the same time slowly coaxing Ventus to moan, whimper, and gasp. It seemed easier while Vanitas barely crawled on top of him, his dark hair making his eyes look hollow, yet his pale face softer.

“Stay with me,” Vanitas whispered against his lips.

Ventus smiled, opening his eyes so he could look into his golden irises. “I don’t want to be anywhere else.”

It was so cheesy, so sappy, so love struck, and almost painful while their heart raced against one another’s, as if they always, inevitably belonged to one another. And Ventus had almost thought, maybe it was there at one point, sitting in the back of his throat, but he knew that they were day and night, a cycle that would never end, touching one another, blending together, never separating.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided to end it at 7 chapters because the KH fandom isn't as responsive as other fandoms, and writing 4-5-6k a chapter without a response is really annoying. (And yeah, it shouldn't just be about kudo's or comments, but I like to know when people enjoy my stories.) I wanted to add Vanitas and Ventus' connection from the games, and the new info from the DLC (which I think is complete bullshit since it's established in BBS that Vanitas is the pure darkness of Ventus, so it would make sense if he gained that back, if not, Ventus is literally a Princess of Heart/Pure Light, but he's not a Princess of Heart, so he'd need his pure darkness to feel whole again. At least in my opinion. Maybe I should write a fic about that.)
> 
> I was thinking maybe it's the drugs and alcohol that turned off a lot of people. :/ Idk. Tbh, I wanted to write a fic with Zexion and Demyx in a similar setting as this one. But who knows if I'll do that. 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed.
> 
> Comments and/or Kudo's are appreciated.


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